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GLOSSARY

19 vaginas? Friendship rape? Cuddlahs? What the fuck are we talking about?

Shit! We've lost track! Luckily our friend Vicky was kind enough to take a minute to document the mental diarrhea that makes its way from our brains to our mouths every week. If you want an official definition or if you are a rookie who wants to get the lingo down so you aren't raped in the showers or shanked in the yard, here is your cheat sheet.

Good luck in there!

1070am Radio: The Lamb –

They play more podcasts than any other station.  [ep #84]

12 Days of Cuddlemas –

This song and Walking the Room the Podcast (a Rudolph rewrite) are Cuddlah Carols written by Patton Oswalt.  [ep #30]

127 Hours –

Greg's friend was on a second date with a guy who had a seizure during this film, which led to a ‘no third date' consensus.  [ep #26]

19 Vaginas –

1. When Dave described his neighbor Crickets as missing a toe, thus having only 19 digits total, Greg anticipated him saying she had 19 vaginas.  [ep #18]
2. Greg has been many characters, including the woman with the 19 vaginas.  [ep #18]
3. Crickets collectively refers to her vaginas as “The Field.”  [ep #50]
(see: Crickets)

2 Stubs to Tourgasm –

If these were found in Buster Posey’s locker, it would break Dave’s spirit much like Cousins broke Posey’s body.  [ep #53]

2012 Blossom Massacre –

Dave witnessed this Mayim Bialik car accident.  [ep #117]

5K –

Dave is appalled that Greg drove through the valley of Robert Downey Jr. & Ben Stiller at the BAFTA's when the intended brag was actually this run.  [ep #80]

70's –

1. A mustache time of big bushes and key parties. STD's, drug addiction and Scooby Doo were invented, and it was always sundown. Dave likes the music and films made in (but not always set in) this decade, but Greg hates it - and HE drove! He doesn't like the vibe of it, The Grateful Dead of it, and finds the crock pots full of stanky genitals, fermented smells and crabs to be a bummer.  [ep #79]
2. Greg does a PSA to clarify he hates the essence of it.  [ep #80]

9 Out of 10 Experts –

The amount of experts that WTR can legally claim recommend the show, thanks to the $500 fee the Golden Gods of TOFOP paid to register and own the phrase.  [ep #40]

90's Rock Pussy –

A Courtney Love or an Alanis Morrisette is like a lobster you want to get in a hot tub with - you want to boil it up and soak in the broth.  [ep #97]

Aces –

Please go to iTunes & leave a review that includes this word.  [ep #116]

Acoustic Guitar –

1. Dave has a strict zero-tolerance policy for Greg implementing this instrument into the cuddle.  [ep #39]
2. Dave explains that when people play guitar in intimate settings, he can't fucking handle it.  [ep #49]

Action Man –

1. If you’re a man who listens to podcasts or a chick with some emotional problems that’s who you are cause you get it.  [ep #71]
2. Bring it back for some positivity, bro.  [ep #92]

Adam & Eve –

1. Here’s the thing – our listener jerks off. So why not save?! Visit sponsor adamandeve.com & use the code “hobotang” to get 50% off almost any item!  [ep #72] 2. The site for toys of the inserting kind, movies of the watching kind and panties of the eating kind, but not sticky from your hang down. Check out their mobile site for a dildo on-the-go!  [ep #74]  3. Don't put a Twix up your butt - go to someone who specializes in putting stuff in you. Use "hobotang" to get 50% off your dry & wet goods.  [ep #75]

ADD –

Greg is so ADD, he won’t let Dave finish a sentence.  [ep #72]

ADD Podcast –

This description of WTR is an indictment of Greg as a human & his inability to stick with it. One example is the 26 minutes that passed between Greg announcing he had “3 things” to say about Van Halen (at 03:01) and him remembering the third thing (at 29:29).  [ep #108]

Adderall –

Dave begs Greg to get on it, but he won’t take drugs.  [ep #108]

Address –

The word an out-of-town Christmas Tree Delivery Operation without GPS uses for “directions”.  [ep #82]

Advice –

When it comes to show content, they’re never, ever going to take yours. 
[ep #55]

After Walking the Room –

Greg urges Cuddlahs to create this post-cuddle discussion podcast.  [ep #72]

Agua con Gas –

This product, buttle-bottled mineral water, or ‘water with gas,’ is an official cuddle sponsor.  [ep #56]

Ah, Fuck It –

Dave thinks this should be a Ben & Jerry’s flavor.  [ep #70]

AIDS –

1. What used to be a 2 year death sentence is now a popular UCB punchline that wipes out entire genres, like white guys playing the blues - sole survivor Jack White is on a drip.  [ep #92]
2. It's still around, but it's been domesticated, and now we know that you can't get it from watching Fame.  [ep #94]

Albertina –

A pretty girl going to the big city. Star of That He/She and She's Him!  [ep #95]

Allen, Tim –

Dave’s impression is back by popular demand!  Despite sounding more like Yoda or Cookie Monster, Dave swears he nails it, and Greg perceives it as a dead-on Craig Ferguson.  [ep #58]

Already in a Band, Bro –

Greg's response when Jack Black asked if he wanted to get together and play guitars.  [ep #95]

Already-Been-In –

A pie you put out for company even though you've already eaten a few slices.  [ep #27]

Alternate Show Titles –

Other titles for Walking the Room include "Smoking on the Bench Press" and "Are You Sure You Wanna Come to Hollywood?"  [ep #81]

Ambien –

While under the influence of this drug, Greg’s Dad, Dick Behrendt, passed out during a phone call with his brand new love interest. When he regained consciousness, there were four firemen in his bedroom.  [ep #43]

America's #1 Cum City –

San Fran holds this prestigious title because the city is covered in cum, hence their slogan, “Cum to San Francisco.”  [ep #98]

America's Original Emo Comic –

Gould; not to be confused with Philips.  [ep #95]

American Apparel –

Where the chain gang holds photo shoots & waves to traffic.  [ep #85]

American Cock Doc –

The 1999 HBO documentary that revealed the world’s biggest cock belongs to an unemployed video game reviewer named Falcon that was frisked by the TSA and doesn’t do porn because he wants people to take him seriously.  [ep #113]

Anal Bree –

After unintentionally declaring ‘YES!’ during a Behrendt bit on anal, A.B.’s collegiate life was forever changed.  [ep #47]

Anal Dry Heaves –

A hanger-winning listener’s cuddle-induced symptom that Greg believes are called farts.  [ep #39]

Angry Beat –

The furious backdrop to an aggressive rap that starts, “She's WASTED”, “She's DRUNK” or “Bridges be Hanging”.  [ep #92]

Anti-Chamber –

A hallway.  [ep #97]

Antose Intolerant –

When you’re allergic to Dave An-toth-ny.  [ep #71]

Anxiety –

Contrary to Greg’s belief, you CAN talk someone out of this – it’s what therapists do.  [ep #109]

Argh, I'm a Pirate!: The World's Worst Audition Stories –

This book, which was being written at the time of Dave's Audition Tourettes, actually changed its title to incorporate the quote Dave decided would best portray a cop doing improv.  [ep #82]

Armenian Air –

Segment that discusses Gilly’s hobotang-infested front lawn and debates body hair stereotypes.  [ep #73]

Arrowhead Drunk –

An intervention is necessary after consuming this water becomes about more than just hydrating and you’re picking up 24 bangers at Pavilions.  [ep #100]

Ashen Pilot –

What you don't want to see as a passenger on your flight since it only happens once in a pilot's lifetime - when a plane almost hits another plane.  [ep #88]

Ask Dave –

Dave's advice column on the Hotdog Thunderdome.  [ep #88]

Asperger's –

Collecting classic video game music is a type of this Autism that the guys don't understand.  [ep #89]

Asscenta –

It's rare, but one out of every few million births come out the butthole as a result of disappointed babies attempting bank robbery style getaways.  [ep #87]

Asshole Tattoo –

1. It’s a good idea to get them while you’re on meth, high as a biker, with your shirt off.  [ep #117]  2. Greg’s gonna get “Rob Delaney” tattooed on his asshole so that you can go see him & it.  [ep #117] 3. A popular style reads "How U Iz?"  [ep #117]

Asshole Tattoos –

WTR is opposed to asshole tattoos. Always have been. It’s on our crest!  [ep #118]

Astringent & Eye Cream –

Greg's pride in using these and other skincare products makes Dave want to hit him in the teeth with a hammer.  [ep #38]

Attack of the Hobotang –

The tale of an airborne virus that turns an unsuspecting public into hobotang, and the hero that's consciously fighting the urge to transform.  (Oranges will be provided for the audience on opening night).  [ep #54]

Aukerman Building –

1. Dave & Greg intend on ending it all by jumping off its roof [ep #61], but since it’s only 2 stories, they end up paralyzed.  [ep #65]
2. The first time Dave jumped off, he was hallucinating off Miracle Green. 
[ep #65]
3. The future Earwolf Compound will invite people in, but then charge them to leave.  The trapped talent panic, and begin pitching podcasts like “Lots about Minerals” & “Papayas Today.”  [ep #65]

Auspicious Mike –

Dave’s ex-fiancée’s dad used mafia money to bet on this horse and lost. 
[ep #59] 

Aussie Cock Shots –

The shots of semen served in Australia.  [ep #97]

Australian Phenom –

Wil Anderson; part female, part Vietnam vet.  [ep #83]

Awesome –

Walking the Room sets the course for this, but bails out at mediocre.  [ep #83]

Axe –

noun:
1. The smell of rape, made with 100% pure cricket.  [ep #31]
2. After Dave received their full line of products for Christmas from his mother-in-law, he re-gifted the Axe Phoenix set to Greg, who had gotten him a Mr. T commemorative plate.  [ep #31] 
verb:
3. When detailing, be sure to Axe your Sacks.  [ep #31]

Aztecs –

Ethnic group Greg's targeting because they've had it too good for too long.  [DoSP]

“Ok, Relax” –

(or “Everyone Relax, It's Ok”
The first line of Charlie's first live stand-up performance.  [DoSP]

Baby’s Choice –

When Crickets becomes pregnant, it's up to her baby to decide which of the 19 vaginas it wants to be birthed from.  [ep #48]

Bachmanns –

Anti-gay groups.  [ep #63]

Bag Full of Fingers –

1. Greg predicts that ten years from now, Cuddlah Ronnie Schiller will most likely be found with this in her possession.  [ep #48]
2. Investigators will also uncover that select fingers were used as Dave, Greg & Patton dolls to reenact WTR premises in a miniature model closet. 
[ep #50]

Baggle –

Not a bagel, a ball sack.  [ep #53]

Baldhead Phillips –

Comedian dressed like Cedric the Entertainer that denied looking like him.  [ep #74]

Balloons –

1. With proper care, toys can last a lifetime, but a balloon is like a rubber baby, five-day puppy or an animal waiting to die a violent death.  [ep #67]  
2. They're the same deal as pets - they don't last all day.  [ep #76]
3. Reference a disappointing incident with these terrible toys to explain a goldfish death to children.  [ep #86]

Bananarama –

What Greg blasts from his Mini Cooper while buzzing along to Fresno.  [ep #87]

Bar Baby –

Family-oriented LA club where infants can sleep on the bar, play with the bottles & caps on the floor, and watch iCarly. (Not to be confused with Baby Gin, the higher-end establishment where babies must adhere to a dress code.)  [ep #76]

Barnes & Noble Bathroom –

1. Dave walked into a stall only to find the toilet splattered with an alarming amount of blood.  [ep #39]
2.
He was greeted at the urinal moments later by a man who made eye contact and asked, “How’s your Barnes & Noble experience going?”  [ep #39]

Bath Salts –

This product, falsely labeled by street chemists, is actually a drug that causes users to break into a stranger's home to decorate for the holidays, light a candle and watch TV.  [ep #79]

Batman –

You can call someone a cunt for liking Adam West and it doesn’t matter because they’ll like the show anyway.  [ep #101]

Beans –

While Greg was eating them, his father-in-law brought him a picture of beans in a book.  [ep #93]

Bears –

Posehn is the George Clooney of, and poster child for, their community.  
[ep #58]

Beavis & Butthead –

Greg & Dave compared themselves to the animated duo, but ultimately bowed down, acknowledging "we're not that good."  [ep #37]

Bed & Breakfast –

(or B&B)   Dave visited on in Napa where the owner was a talker whose life story flows out of her like an avalanche. Key events included her marriage breaking up over her the daughter she couldn’t let out of her sight (including sleeping in the same bed each night & attending slumber parties with her). The plot thickened when her B&B partner appeared – said daughter’s boyfriend. The couple is in their 20’s and have been dating since they were 12, despite his blatant homosexuality and her having fled the country under the guise of dance.  [ep #115]

Beef's –

(or Parsley's)
The restaurant chain that pays a nude guy to hang out in the bathroom.  [ep #91]

Behind the Tweet –

The show Greg is making that’s a lot like Dave’s book, How Tweets Come Together[ep #110]

Belushi, Jim –

1. Gilmartin has seen nearly all his films, and his face is the fast-forward button on Paul’s remote.  [ep #114]   2. The hunt for a decent Belushi film turned up no results, but they’re glad they took the listener there.  [ep #114]

Benson –

Not once did this TV show make Doug consider changing his name to avoid Robert Guillaume jokes.  [ep #116]

Berlin –

The perfect place for a madcap romp to lighten your image when you're taken too seriously.  [ep #95]

Best Actor in a Scene with People Arguing Around Him –

Dave Anthony.  [ep #82]

Beyond the Bum-Out Level –

Alternate podcuddle title that accurately describes the show.  [ep #76]

Bicep –

After getting his first girlfriend's face wet, Greg practiced making out with this to work on it.  [ep #97]

Bill –

1. Dave’s neighbor Crickets’ Yorkshire Terrier.  [ep #32]
2.
Dave caused Bill to go missing by locking him out of the complex when he closed the gate.  [ep #38]
3.
He was recovered, but not before Crickets confronted another woman with the same breed of dog insisting it was Bill.  [ep #39]

Bin Laden –

1. News of his death broke during a recording of the cuddle, a mere 30 minutes after Dave asked Greg if his parents were in the Taliban.  [ep #49]
2. Since the 50th Episode Extravaganza coincided with one week since the death of bin Laden, the guys took a moment to share their favorite Osama memories, including tales of coke binges, blow jobs, his close friendship with Buster Poindexter, a downward spiral triggered by the cancellation of Fridays, and his life-long regret over a Stifler audition prank.  [ep #50]

Bitch Tits & the Sweater Boy –

1. Dave & Greg's alter egos [ep #22] that Patton knows as ‘The Sweater Girl & Dude Boobs McGee’ star in 'Sweaters & Tits' on ABC at 8.  [ep #21]
2. Dave was warned by his shady uncle that, one day, his pecs would turn to tits, as is the case with most inmates.  [ep #68]

Black Lingerie Magazine –

Greg is upset because 711 never publishes his letters about this misleading periodical.  [ep #90]

Black Sabbath –

Tired, tiny cock.  [LC #1]

Black Things –

A mother that's so liberal she's racist assumes these are the things her adopted black child will enjoy, such as a tambourine like Stevie Wonder, a ball like Magic Johnson, a Will Smith movie or something by Uncle Kanye.  [ep #79]

Blaine, David –

He would say “Leo,” scratch his belly and touch a model. That was his life.  [ep #103]

Block & Move On –

Jen Kirkman's new approach to end her often-referenced history of Twitter fights now that Judd Apatow is following her.  [LC #1]

Blog Like Fuck –

What happens when you see Patton.  [LC #2]

Blood Around the Bowl –

Greg & Dave are performing at this benefit for anal dry heaves & weeping assholes in support of helping people ‘keep the blood up inside.'  [ep #39]

Blorts –

Blue Shorts. You can’t watch Paul Blart: Mall Cop without them, and Havasu’s gonna be a fucking disaster if you can’t find them.  [ep #115]

Boat Buddy –

Somewhere in Alaska there's an abandoned boat, and the captain made a surprising call to these friends by asking, “Say there fella, have you got any corn?” Then he blew the boat horn and got a boat lift, because a spiky boot & a fur coat ain't gonna do you forever.  [ep #80]

Body by Goldblum –

Wil follows Jeff Goldblum around the gym just to use the machines directly after him – you use the Goldblum settings, you get the Goldblum workout.  
[ep #58]

Bohan –

1. A friend of Dave’s from college who had a play in his head, but he’ll just give you a little bit – i.e. blurting out “doggy porn!” with no further explanation. That’s Bohan.  [ep #120]   2. Bohan will go sans perme in your car - he’ll make out with his girl in the back while fingering your girl in the front.  [ep #120]

Bono, Chaz –

Some people want to go transgender, but NO ONE wants to go Chaz Bono.  [ep #70]

Booksmarks Bar –

Greg’s not gonna tell Dave about the black licorice websites he lists on this to easily visit later.  [ep #111]

Boots Riley –

1. A reggae Irish gentleman who runs a bar down in Jamaica.  [ep #72]  2. Street Sweeper Social Club member that Rockupied Wall Street. Nothing vaguely Irish or Reggae about him.  [ep #74]

Booty Smell Good Doe –

That’s a website.  [ep #115]

Bottom Half of Hot –

WTR occasionally ranks here amongst iTunes comedy podcasts. [ep #75]

Bouncy House –

They’ll run you about $80 a day, so you can live in one when it all falls apart.  [ep #111]

Box of Boxes –

A boring product whose commercial runs on TV at the Brotel.  [ep #63]

Boy Bags –

1. Plastic bags designed with the same purpose as cleaning up after your dog, but for HoboKid.  [ep #108]
2. Greg thinks it sounds like a boy band, but Dave thinks it means something else.  [ep #108]

Boy Toy –

Dave's role in Australia – he wears a belt buckle, tight tank top, super short-shorts and watches Greg's sets, but he doesn't laugh or giggle, he just mutters, “That's so funny".  [ep #97]

Boys Department at Macy’s –

Where filmmakers shopped for Swayze’s shirts.  [ep #114]

Break Bad –

It's all you're trying to do while displaying American ingenuity by spending 6 hours in Walmart making meth.  [ep #83]

Breaking Bad –

Aside from enjoying it, Dave has no affiliation with this show, but has been mistaken for the other chemist from the back.  [ep #60]

Brian –

1. The drunk Brooklyn cop that lost his gun, then gave Dave a bottle of booze for finding his drop piece.  [ep #94]
2. When you have dinner with him & his “fag” boyfriend, there's no need for the inadvertently offensive adjective – we already understand what their relationship is.  [ep #94]

Brian Wilson –

Perry Farrell sings what he sees from stage, like this San Francisco Giant (not Beach Boy) and friend of Brody Stevens.  [ep #74]

Bro in the Know –

The witness now complicit in the blow job. The recipient must smile & nod, acknowledging to said bro, ‘I’m doing this for us, as men, because you know this is awesome.'  [ep #117]

Brody, Adrien –

He made a somewhat aggressive pass at Greg’s wife, but to keep the story from being a 2, let’s just say he put his dick in her soup.  [ep #63]

Brohawk –

Greg’s mohawk-meets-pompadour hairstyle.  [ep #64]

Broken Dreams & Empty Promises –

What the podcast is made of.  When Dave finally took it up a level, they condemned the hotel.  [ep #84]

Bromo –

1. A confused bro that attends the Fashion Institute, makes the Jersey Shore look smart, and gets jumped at a Fashion Party.  [ep #80] 2. His Gangsta Rap Party lasted til 4am and all the major players in the fashion industry attended – him & 25 hot Asian girls in jorts.  [ep #115]

Bronies –

1. Fetish-y dudes that are into My Little Pony porn.  [ep #96]
2. Greg & Dave have been asked to “be cool about the whole brony thing.”  [ep #100]
3. Dave thinks Greg shouldn’t be allowed to make fun of them anymore because he follows Red Vines and posts topless pictures of himself on Instagram.  [ep #111]
4. Greg’s new blue mane looks a little brony-ish.  [ep #111]

Bros –

The gym where everyone stares and drinks protein shakes, so they’ve got the arms, but they're soft in the middle.  [ep #70]

Brosts –

Radioactive ghosts that haunt the Brotel.  [ep #61]

Brotel –

1. A bachelor party themed hotel for bros, offering stripper poles, hose-downs, and wide parking spaces for Hummers and boats.  [ep #61]
2. Greg stayed there with fellow ‘old bros’ Spike Lee, Spike Jonze, Kevin Pollak, Bradley Whitford, Kevin Costner & The Beastie Boys.  [ep #61]
3. The film adaptation stars Dave Anthony as the bro-hating Brotel clerk, whose plan with the townspeople to overthrow the bros takes a backseat to the sudden emergence of...BROSTS!  [ep #61]

Bruce Vilanch Soup –

Dave was once in a hot tub when a naked Vilanch entered; this formed because he's a dangerous muppet that doesn't stay together.  [ep #79]

Brushdoggin’ –

Inserting a toothbrush in your asshole, bristles first.  [ep #50]

Buffets & Magic –

Another show on The WTRN. The hosts eat at a buffet and do magic on the audio podcast without explaining what's happening. Sometimes vegetables come out of birds when they mix the two topics and perform their trademark trick of having peas come out of a dove.  [ep #94]

Build Me a House –

A Denny’s customer in Austin, Texas, demanded this of Greg, whom he mistook for Ty Pennington. Greg explained he was actually FTD Dos – a DIFFERENT Frosted-Tipped Douche.  [ep #46] 
(see also: Frosted-Tipped Douche)

Bukkake of Plaid –

Dana Gould's description of the closet.  [ep #95]

Bullock, Jim J. –

The last person before Greg that James Hetfield’s wife encouraged to text her husband was TV's Monroe.  [ep #6]

Bumcast –

WTR may turn into this by booking hobos off the street, but these guests can only do a segment because they fall asleep or leave to go score.  [ep #85]

Bump & Dump –

The cause & effect of snorting Metamucil or cocaine cut with baby laxatives.  [ep #65]

Bunny Fuck Your Face with Chocolate –

This potential T-shirt slogan referencing the ‘kill us with candy’ mentality
[ep #22 & #23] tested better than the rape-themed motto ‘I Will Fuck Your Shankhole.’  [ep #39]

Burning Man –

1. Greg strives to make the cuddle the only podcast you can listen to at this festival.  [ep #1]
2. Dave has 0 to -5% interest in going, but Greg wants to do a mini-version in his yard to try it out.  [ep #89]
3. Their show is your balls at Burning Man.  [ep #93]

Bush Years –

Circa 1982-84, before the shaving revolution, when bushes were as tall as they were wide, and they were coming out the sides, like a tumbleweed that got away.  [ep #73]

Butterfly Opening –

1. Dave’s barista’s wonderful play.  [ep #73]
2. The move you need to successfully corndog.  [ep #73]
3. When the wings spread, like when you're bent over a chair.  [ep #73]

Buttle –

1. Greg believes your soul likely comes out of this when you die, and the subsequent hose-down is purgatory.  [ep #62]
2. A colonic could harm it and bum out your doctor.  [ep #65]
3. Acknowledge it's there with a front door entry and a back door wave. Why not see the whole house?  [ep #92] 4. Dave collects them; he has 75.  [ep #114]

Buying a Painting –

What Greg's doing when he pulls down his pants and rubs his ass on a work of art.  [ep #85]

By the Ears, Man! –

Yell it at a lacrosse game to indicate the players should pull someone's head down to their cock.  [ep #86]

C.H.U.D. –

The only group WTR claims to speak for - Cannibalistic Humanoid Underground Dwellers.  [ep #39]

Cadillac –

When Matt Besser drummed on this rental car’s trunk after nearly being run over by it, the car pulled up onto the sidewalk and the massive driver tried to physically confront him, but Besser couldn’t be outrun.  [ep #112]

California Aggro –

The personality type you are when you follow up being a dick with a nonchalant “whatever, man” – you’re being both guys and it’s horseshit.  [ep #109]

California Roll –

Out of tampons and need something spongy? Help yourself to one of these!  [ep #109]

Camp Freddy –

The ultimate cover band experience performed by band members of the 80's & 90's providing a night of 'Who's Old Next'. Bros & hoes enjoy this Lawrence Welk for people with Gonorrhea, despite the occasional Linda Perry Misstep. Shows close with a single audience member loudly stating “that sucked”.  [ep #81]

Can I Put my Pussy in your Pony? –

If you're a female that wants to launch a modeling career, this is the first question you have to ask. Get a horse, put it down, gut it, then recreate Star Wars and take snapshots while hiding inside the dead animal, naked.   [ep #76]

Can of Cunts –

1. A flippant remark blurted out by Dave during a McConaughey rant.
2. The phrase later shook Permanent Midnight author Jerry Stahl to his very core.  [ep #37]
3. Have you ever opened a fresh Can of Cunts? The great taste and the wonderful smell of a Can of Cunts – that’s what WTR is.  [ep #36]
4. It’s a high-end product, unlike its counterpart, Bag of Cocks, which is sold in a burlap sack as it’s the potato of the vegetable world.  [ep #36]

Can't –

Greg's dad taught him he'd be saying & hearing a lot of this.  [LC #1]

Canadian Topless –

(or The Canuck Hello) The preferred way of getting the shit beat out of you, a la LaBeouf – it’s when a Canadian tries to put you against the glass where there isn’t any.  [ep #74]

Cancer –

The cure for cancer, as discovered by Eddie Van Halen, is in your tongue.
Get a razor.  [ep #41]

Candy –

1. Greg & Dave compulsively love treats. Submit candy & cookies for review.
2. Greg wants to go back to solid candy, i.e., if it has bug wings in it, he's not gonna eat it.  [ep #80]

Cape Town –

1. A town in South Africa where baboons - as exclaimed in road signs - fuck in the streets.  [ep #67]
2. After dialing 1-800-Love-Pumpkin, the hotline for deportation advice, callers are often sent here to slaughter baboons as a solution.  [ep #86]

Captain America –

(or The New Christ
The would-be child of Tim Tebow & Lolo Jones.  [ep #105]

Car Fires –

Setting them is an okay way to say 'I don't agree with your policies'.  [ep #86]

Cardboard –

If you stated ‘that motherfucker don’t take shit from’ this to describe a lone rioting Asian, you’d be straight-up facting.  [ep #102]

Cardigan –

1. This token Behrendt article of menswear has translated into signature Cuddlah attire.  [eps #16 & #66]
2.
The ultimate in Sweater Metal is the Double Cardi.  [ep #19]

Cards: The Description: The Movie –

Greg is working on this script and a follow-up based on the card game War while Dave is writing the shoelace-themed Space Laces[ep #53]

Carey, Drew –

Their friendship is the reason Dave knows the price of things.  [ep #68]

Carlisle, Belinda –

1. During a reality TV show pitch for this former Go-Go’s lead singer, a neighbor of Greg’s dropped dead.  Dave believes "that was God saying ENOUGH," [ep #39] while Jimmy Pardo felt it was "God saving us from television.”  [ep #65]
2.
The pitch for Belindia would’ve allowed viewers to learn about her & the land - India thru the eyes of an 80’s pop star. An alternate idea is Belindled, a show where she belittles guests each week.  [ep #65]

Carol –

Greg won't have Dave to refer to this woman he woke up next to as a dumpster.  [ep #98]

Carson, Johnny –

Jake Johannsen was guilted by older ladies at a wax museum into taking a picture with the Carson replica, despite having video of himself with Johnny on The Tonight Show.  [ep #107]

Carted –

(or Foughed, Caroughtin’)
Cough and fart at the same time.  [ep #51]

Cartwheels & Brainiac –

Greg's daughters.  [ep #84]

Caste System –

India’s inherited social-status hierarchy that only Dave was aware existed.  [ep #65]

Cat & Fiddle –

An English-style pub for lost rock bands where J. Geils tends bar. Stop by and enjoy events like Boston Wednesdays, Canned Heat Thursdays and Saturday Brunch with Dire Straits!   [ep #75]

Cat Coupon Dude –

What Dave has become because every penny counts. Maron can't relate because cat listeners send homemade cat food to his cats.  [ep #81]

Catch a Fairy –

It doesn’t mean to catch a boat or to cling onto a gay fella – it refers to the literal act of capturing a tiny fairy.  [ep #102]

Catering Tux –

Don’t throw it away – just in case.  [ep #54]

Catocratic Oath –

The same oath human doctors take, slightly altered for vets, ending in a meow, whiney or rhetorical 'who let the dogs out'.  [ep #76]

CD Local 101 –

This Cum Drinkers Union ensures workers receive payment in the Prank-Based Economy.  [ep #89]

Cellies –

Prison roommates.  [ep #46]

Chainsaw Fucked –

Greg's going to steal this from Dane Cook, use it in an interview, and call it even.  (see: Chicken Situation)  [ep #88]

Chalice –

Jake Johannsen was bummed out when he dropped his and it shattered.  [ep #107]

Charlie Browns –

Both Dave & Greg; they go to podcast and people keep moving the football.  [ep #84]

Checks Out –

What Greg does when he breaks concentration and mentally drifts away; it can happen at any time, whether he's listening to Dave, or bathing his baby.  [ep #57]

Cheez-Its –

Both flavors made available at Live Cuddle #5 - white cheddar & black onion.  [ep #118]

Chelsea Smile –

When you hold a knife against someone's throat and kick them in the balls.  [ep #98]

Chicken –

1. All we know about Greg’s "Unusable Impression of No One" is that he wants this and is friends with C.C. DeVille.  [ep #100]
2. You’re offered a big ol’ piece when you’re welcomed to his castle. This and pigeon.  [ep #102]
3. Nobody brings it camping.  [ep #110]

Chicken Situation –

During a TV interview at a diner, Dane Cook sat down and ordered himself up this classic Behrendt bit.  [ep #23]

China –

It’s not a good jam for the folks who are living there. Hey, broseph, brotangle - outside of the Olympics,  it’s NOT a quality jam.  [ep #110]

Chinese News Segment –

WTR shares news stories from China to school listeners on society run amuck via tales of air-pumps-in-anus pranks turned tragic. Dave’s obsessed, but Greg doesn’t love it.  [ep #113]

Choke –

How Greg nearly died on-air when Dave farted and he choked on a Coke.  [ep #80]

Christmas Dick Triangle –

When I got my dick out, you got your dick, 3 dicks in a row, it's this.  [ep #81]

Christmas Tree Farm –

The Hobotangs plan to own and operate one upon relocating to Oregon. 
[ep #38]

Chunky Monkey –

When Wil discovered this pint of Ben & Jerry’s had melted after accidentally being put in the fridge, he drank it.  [ep #58]

Chutes & Ladders –

While Dave's career is ladders, going up, Greg's is chutes, sliding downhill, despite him being extremely busy with all his fictitious jobs.  [ep #76]

Cinders of a Burning Tranny –

Greg would like to fuck them.  [ep #82]

Clark, Anthony –

Greg spotted him either cruising for men in a park, or working as a groundskeeper while starring on a hit TV series.  [ep #62]

Classic American Gasbag –

1. Patton Oswalt.  [ep #50]
2. He returns to the closet only to be attacked by clothing.  [ep #81]
3. There’s a blustering, hot shit coming out of his mouth, like a fecal cloud.  [ep #100]

Classic Golden Asshole –

(or GA)
When Grip Em Ups are so successful that your asshole outlives you.  [ep #51]

Cleansing Rain –

The Stormfront Comedy Network Tour.  [ep #92]

Clearly Getting Hummer’d –

Dave witnessed these incidents - undisputable BJ’s in action - through his neighbor’s window and in the car next to his at a red light.  [ep #117]

Clickity Clickity Clickity Clickity Cum –

An example of a premeditated Greg tweet.  [ep #81]

Clip of You Looking at Pussies –

Greg thought an agent had said this after watching a vaginal rejuvenation clip from the talk show – the man had actually said “purses”.  [ep #93]

Cliques –

This show is not popular with anyone, so the guys aren't a part of any – not UCB, CBB or Redmeat.  [ep #84]

Clit Mitts –

Mittens covered in clitorises that you wear to show you’re comfortable in your sexuality and you love vagina. Put on your Clit Mitts, put on your Pussy Pants, and you’re ready for the day.  [ep #108]

Closet –

1.  The podcuddle is recorded in Greg’s closet.  [ep #11 - present]
2.  Dave calls it The Rape Cage.  [ep #24]
3.  When Axe was sprayed in the closet mid-cuddle, only a farting candle could diffuse it.  [ep #31]
4.  Patton is confident that children from the Narnia books would podcast in a similar locale.  [ep #50]
5.  They left the closet for one episode to record with Pardo.  [ep #65]
6.  Greg can't “join” Dave on the show since they're recording in his home.  [ep #81]
7.  Approx. 6'x15'  [ep #91]
8.  They're going to replace a shoe rack with two seats to create a celebrity box for spectators like Neve Campbell, Brad Garrett, The Arquette Family or a box of crayons.  [ep #97]
9.  They hold auditions in there and have actors read sides.  [ep #107]
10. A sweat lodge for the emotionally overwhelmed.  [ep #114]

Closet Tour of the Valley –

Jake Johannsen made WTR his first stop on this, not knowing that’s also where it would end, along with his career.  [ep #107]

Clothes –

They’re more important to Greg than food.  [ep #104]

Clothesline –

Greg used this move to take out his niece, then he spiked the candy bowl. 
[ep #51]

Clown Facial –

When a clown's flower squirts directly in your face.  [ep #99]

Clown From the Neck Down –

(or CFTND)
1. Not just the uniform, but a way of life.  FA-MI-LY!  [eps #16 & #66]
2. The style of dress consisting of baggy clown pants and an optional cardigan.  [eps #16 & #66]
3. Cuddlahs are clown from the neck down as opposed to Juggalos, who are clown from the neck up.  [eps #16 & #66]
4. This is how you start a revolution - the Nazis had uniforms, so do we.  [ep #40]
5. Dave & Greg went full CFTND at the first live cuddle at Meltdown  [LC #1], which some of their clientele mistook for superhero attire.  [ep #78]
6. Brendon Walsh owns a full suit from his days working as a Drunken Clown, and breaks out the old uniform when he wants to “slip into something more hilarious”.  [LC #1]
7. Clown attire is a dead giveaway that an audience member is a fan and they're lost.  [ep #89]
8. Greg's one man show in Australia.  [ep #96]  9. Cuddlahs don’t go full-clown.  [ep #113]

Clown Gun –

A little box with a trigger – when you shoot it, a distracting clown pops out, allowing for a quick getaway when you're caught sobbing in your ex-girlfriend's home in front of her & her new boyfriend.  [ep #97]

Clownstairs –

1. Genitals; what a Cuddlah calls The Kit.  [ep #72]
2. If your clownstairs liquefies, write a bit and consult voodoo.  [ep #72]

Cock Eating Ghosts –

The explanation you give a 3 year old as to why he can’t pee in the living room.  [ep #120]

Cock Fairy –

The great & powerful strain of human that celebrates their sexuality by wearing cocks on their feet. Dave’s wife thinks their son saw him at a Gay Pride Parade because he wouldn’t stop saying Penis Shoes[ep #108]

Cock Insanity –

A good way to stop weeping sore update texts is to fire back a picture of your junk. Send a pic of your long-flat laying soft with the message “Right back 'atcha”. Recipients will experience both the horror of who you are as a person & the joy of having a distraction. So when you feel that buzz in your pants, it's surprise time!  [ep #86]

Cock Stump –

Greg’s parents gave him this version of a cat scratching post so he’d have an item to hump as a child.  [ep #108]

Cod Puddle –

1. The stain a really horny whitefish leaves on the bed.  [ep #37]
2.
What Dave’s ass has become from lack of grip em ups; a wet, loose ‘mauce’ muddle.  [ep #73]

Coke Numbers –

Magazine that publishes the official cocaine dealer rankings as compiled through user reviews and star ratings.  [ep #68]

Collins, Phil –

When he stepped out from behind the drum kit, we all lost.  [ep #57]

Color Man –

Patton establishes Greg is the worst one in the world, as he adds unneeded spice to the already God awful things Dave says.  [ep #50]

Comedy Central's Website –

It lists everyone who's ever done comedy besides Dave Anthony.  [ep #84]

Comedy Clubs –

Shows pitched in an attempt to recreate this ambiance on television include “Bachelor Party,” “Random Blender Drinks,” and “The Manager Used to be a Comic.”  [ep #50]

Comedy Death Reek –

The smell that ultimately escapes a rotting pumpkin filled with various fluids.  [ep #72]

Comic Stores & Movie Theaters –

Posehn’s natural habitats and the only places he’ll leave the house to go.  [ep #101]

Coming Home Stories –

Greg's new book about flights home. Like Hardy Boy mysteries, they all turn out fine.  [ep #88]

Computer Hacker –

What people assume you are if you’re wearing a baseball cap, but don’t follow any sports.  [ep #101]

Cool Things for Cool People –

The type of show stoned Wil Anderson wants to do in Melbourne.  [ep #91]

Corky Romano –

When a commercial director apologized to Dave, he mentioned also being responsible for this movie, in an attempt to make all his amends at once. 
[ep #61]

Corn –

Pardon me, but do you have any of this, the word Greg blurts out when he cums?  [ep #113]

Corndoggin’ –

1. The act of sticking your fist up another man’s ass.  [ep #46] 
2. In prison, the fear of corndoggin’ is a legitimate reason one “can’t have no cellies.”  [ep #46] 
3. Corndog: The Movie.  A man puts his arm elbow-deep into another man’s ass, and then they solve crimes.  Upon catching the perp, they deliver the tagline, “You’ve been corndogged, mothafucka.”  [ep #46]
4. It is unclear as to why one gots to go corndoggin' when they know they got frien.  [ep #50]
5. In 50 years, the ghost of Greg’s house will threaten to do this to frighten the home's new owners.  [ep #51]
6. Gilmartin doesn’t understand how this committed puppetry is a power move.  [ep #73]
7. The guys' new jobs are to attend press junkets to question confused celebs as to why they gotsta.  [ep #84]
8. A topic frequently ranted about by the homeless guy that lives on Greg's MySpace Page [ep #91] amongst unicorn wallpaper, New Found Glory videos and Kanye quotes that are nearly finished loading.  [LC #2]
9. They went corndoggin' when they knew that they had frien and they got FUCKED.  [DoSP]

CorndogginG –

When you fuck someone in the ass, then put your dick in their mouth afterward.  [ep #47]

Cornell, Chris –

When this Soundgarden singer is on your plane, approach him by singing grunge hits of the 90’s by bands that aren’t his.  [ep #102]

Cornhorn –

A shoehorn device for the asshole.  If your victim does grip em ups, or if you don’t have a natural butterfly opening, it helps get your fist in there.  [ep #73]

Corrigan, Kevin –

Yeah, he's good.  [ep #99]

Costco Pie –

1. Even though a pie was slated to arrive on Thanksgiving, Dave bought one because the thought of it ending up in a dumpster was too much to bear. 
[ep #27]
2. Dave began eating the pie three days out, rendering it useless for the holiday, but enabling him to finish it off solo in record time.  [ep #27]  
3. Costco, or large, is the mandatory size needed for a holiday or gathering, and fuck anyone who brings or orders small.  [ep #27]

Costello, Elvis –

Greg got mistaken for him by a woman who's a big fan of anyone in a hat & glasses.  [ep #96]

Cougar –

Trumped by MILF.  [ep #114]

Cover Clowns –

1. When a person performs material that another comedian wrote, they don’t consider themselves joke thieves, merely tribute artists (i.e. Australia’s Got Talent’s Jordan Paris, or Patton Osnot).  [ep #53]
2. Dave feels the most appropriate punishment for Cover Clowns is greater exposure with huge expectations for the debut of their original content. 
[ep #53]

Covered in Blood –

The best possible way a Cuddlah could come to a live show.  [ep #67]

Cowboys & Aliens –

(or Spaceships & Horses)
Greg expected this series of outtakes to be a movie.  [ep #68]

Coyote –

The thing that looks like a fox when you’re out biking.  [ep #65]

Crack Meisner –

When white trash wanders into fairly decent neighborhoods to smoke crack and play-act 'Fix my Lawnmower, Bitch' with his girlfriend using only the line “Fuck you.” (In Studio City, this is called 'having an afternoon.')  [ep #85]

Craig –

Greg’s daughter found Cray-ag to be a funny credit name.  [ep #60]

Craigslist –

This site went down the moment Crickets’ break-up was publicly announced, alerting the masses that vaginas 13 thru 19 were now accepting applicants.  [ep #50]

Crazy Eyes –

Dave asks if this was Greg’s pre-eye surgery nickname.  [ep #49]

Crazy Pussy –

The type of ladies prisoners score with.  [ep #85]

Crème –

1. What Greg DID do was cut off dicks, clean them, lay them out like so much white asparagus at a nice restaurant, and top them with this.  [ep #77]
2. Offer this after entering the bedroom with a spoon.   [ep #77]

Creightons –

The family whose grudge against Dave spanned generations all because his mother rejected a Creighton back in college.  [ep #78]

Crickets –

proper noun ( @Crickets19 ):
1. Dave’s crazy neighbor/friend of Mitch that parks wherever she wants, props open the main gate, and most notably, has 19 vaginas.  [ep #18] 
2. Upon Dave first mentioning her, Greg asked, “Is she hot?” [ep #18], while the TOFOP guys asked, “Is she attractive at all?” (They later admitted it’d be hard to get an accurate read on her rack given the multi-vag distraction). 
[ep #40] 
3. Because her 19 vaginas go ‘crazy for crickets’ she’s frequently tired, especially after pet store visits.  [ep #39]
4. Crickets lived 4 days without gas or electricity.  [ep #46]
5. She's an artist, and stored her paintings in Dave’s garage.  Greg points out that her art would find value amongst Cuddlahs.  [ep #44]
6. Her endless string of different boyfriends are theoretically necessary to satisfy the needs of 19 vaginas.  [ep #48]
7. She’s loud in bed, but if you hear her, tread lightly – you don’t want to get between Crickets & her orgasm.  [ep #55]
8. She swindles her roommate out of money, steals her clothes and takes her dog out off-leash.  [ep #58]
9. She's the purest form of hobotang we’ve ever seen.  [ep #58]  
10. After totaling her Prius drunk driving, her new Nissan Versa got towed after drunk parking.  [ep #64]
11. She’s a booze-hound; a modern day Jackson Pollock, but she’s bad at both.  [ep #64]
12. She thinks she should have free reign over her roommate’s food & wine because the apartment came furnished.  [ep #70]
13. She has loud, constant porno-sex, and when her boyfriend is away, she’s louder still.  [ep #73]
14. #5 has a massive clit, and her boyfriend’s only allowed in #7.  [ep #73]
15. An old staunchy baldie rolled out of a pub, moved in and may have killed her.  [ep #91] 16. She said “hey Doug” to Dave while she was sitting on the stoop smoking a joint.  [ep #118]
noun:
17. These insects are used to feed her 19 vaginas.  You give ‘em crickets cause you can’t find cocks – where would you find 19 cocks?  [ep #18]
18. Crushing crickets with your vagina tightens it right up, and is a safe alternative to rejuvenation surgery or wood glue.  [ep #29]

Crime Covers –

A copycat that covers a criminal's body of work, ala Fred Gein.  [ep #86]

Crime Weekend –

The latest in weekend getaways for men.  Now, instead of the guys at the office organizing a white-water rafting trip, they can sign up for a Crime Weekend.  The objective is a bank robbery - you plan the heist, score a few grand, and maybe even shoot a dude.  [ep #37]

Criminal Tour –

The rundown for America’s version of this live show: The audience enters through a lobby displaying Crickets’ paintings.  Robert Blake opens with a tight 15, followed by an OJ highlight reel to introduce his set. Crickets follows, using her 19 vaginas to entertain as she sees fit – some nights to play the panflute, other nights to have Tiger Woods emerge from The Bar for a quick apology.  A Jordan Paris cameo closes the show.  Coming soon to Australia.  [ep #58]

Crinkly Water Bottles –

What Greg autographs at shows while Jeff Bodart sells T-shirts.  [ep #74]

Crunches –

What Greg calls seeing a guy blow another guy at the gym.  [ep #117]

Crybaby Hate Theater –

1. Term applied to episodes in which both hosts are at rock bottom simultaneously.  [i.e. ep #37] 2. It’s a defeated podcast - not meaning the podcast is fighting something and losing – shit’s just going wrong.  [ep #117]

Cuddlah Classics –

Bits to mentally bookmark for an eventual ‘Best of' reel.  [ep #39]

Cuddlahs –

1. Devout fans of the Walking the Room.  [eps #16 & #66]
2. They promote the show through insults and obscenities.  [ep #29]
3. They don’t attack in packs [ep #19], but are judgmental from afar.  [ep #34]
4. They're the lowest of the low in the nicest way.  [ep #30]
5. Greg believes that the people that hang with WTR are seeking help, and they’ve run out of options.  [ep #39]
6. The literal translation is “shattered humans,” as all listeners are, in some way, broken.  [ep #46]
7. The Cuddlah Code means having no stop button when someone fucks with your family.  [ep #17]
8. Despite being warned against it, there have been some mini-pack attacks.  [ep #106] 9. Every listener of this show now has a podcast.  [ep #115]

Cuddlebee –

A Cuddlah that goes to a live show dressed like Greg, Dave or Clown from the Neck Down.  [ep #40]

Cul-de-Sac of Filth –

Where WTR has been stuck.  [ep #89]

Cultural Exchange –

Experiencing a country's lifestyle via hosing down bathrooms at the YMCA.  [ep #98]

Cum Coinin’ –

When you fuck a hobotang so hard, the coins shoot out of their pockets. 
[ep #50]

Cum Covered Seats –

After seeing a man jerking off into a Mustang, Greg called the dealership to order this feature, as seen on their billboards.  [ep #109]

Cum Into Work –

Slogan that promotes keeping those that cum in their co-workers’ yogurt employed.  [ep #74]

Cum Salad –

(or Calad)
A kid from Greg's childhood would insult others by telling them to eat this.  [ep #92]

Cum-Filled Dinosaur Egg –

Something discussed on the show to get new listeners to leave.  [ep #96]

Cunt Chutney –

You spread this all over your words when you take a sincere question and ask it in a way that’s dripping in twat.  [ep #13]

Cunt Points –

When you heckle a comedian, you lose a lot of comic points, but you gain a lot of these.  [ep #112]

Cunt Punch –

Little girls are trained to do this with a swift boot to the V.  [ep #71]

Cuntoggle –

When the clit gets tired & sags.  [ep #39]

Curious George –

Dave likens Greg to this monkey, and himself to The Man with the Yellow Hat.  [ep #56]

Curry, Adam –

The Podfather & MTV VJ, round 2 of the first crew.  [ep #65]

Curry, Mark –

Star of Hangin' with Mr. Cooper and Don’t Forget Your Toofbrush.  [ep #65]

Currywurst Stories –

The podcast exploring the disdain for tightly-wrapped hot dogs that pop when you chew ‘em.  [ep #118]

Customers –

Listeners of the podcast.  [ep #48]

Cut Out –

Greg has been cut out of 3 films: Dumb & Dumberer, Jerry Maguire, and yes, even He’s Just Not That Into You.  [ep #61]

Daddy Culture –

With nerd culture dead, the new wave is old men that don't get it.  Grandpa Chic consists of grey hair, bad backs and blues records.  Pants up real high, or super low; crotchety, but with a volume.  [ep #36]

Daddy Loves Sports –

Does daddy love you? I don’t know - do you love sports?  [ep #119]

Dangerous Top –

1. As long as this was his son's role, Dave would be fine with him being gay. 
[ep #58] 2. The closeted gay guy who runs a B&B’s to lure in other married, closeted gay guys. He looks at Dave like he’s trying to eat his balls with his eyes & is going to destroy him - but Greg thinks Dave’s mistaking hate for someone wanting to fuck him.  Regardless, B&B’s are a great gigs for DT’s that like cooking eggs in the morning, changing sheets for couples & hosting 'Dudes in the Hot Tub' Night.  [ep #115]

Darting Tongue –

The kissing technique that elicits the reaction, ‘how do I get out of here?’  [ep #105]

Dave & Greg Kill Pretty –

The subtitle that appears in microscopic print under everything WTR posts to disclaim the cuddle's true intent - creating a Wil Anderson snuff film.  [ep #57]

Dave Anthony Support Group –

A support group including Greg and Dave’s wife that meets in a room to unload on Dave. It’s weird, because he’s in it, also.  [ep #107]

Dave’s Career –

A boxcar with this painted label should be opened with caution due to the overwhelming smell of shit, piss, sadness & desperation that wafts out. 
[ep #55]

Dead Beetle Dust –

1. The podcuddle is like the smell of opening a jar containing this.  [ep #62]
2. The Nerdist podcast had this on as a guest but not Greg, and it was one of their better interviews.  [ep #62]

Death Cult –

Walking the Room will ultimately gain mass attention & notoriety over the ever-climbing number of listener suicides.  [ep #63]

Death of SuperPod –

1. This black box recording from an ocean of despair brings self-indulgence to a whole new level, as listeners are urged to mourn the loss of a live podcast made by 4 retards in a room full of people predisposed to like them as if it were Joshua Tree.  [DoSP]
2. Greg, Wil & Charlie, afraid of Dave's reaction, decide to break the news on-air and record it as a podcast. Dave takes it well, having already been through the grieving process, but calls the incident inexcusable and can't promise he won't go Susan's house, drunk on gin, screaming about penguins.  [DoSP] 
3. The 9/11 of podcasts - WHERE WERE YOU?!  [DoSP] 
4. Some coping techniques suggested to Cuddlahs & T-baggers are to film yourself crying or breaking the news to friends & uploading the videos on Facebook, organizing a SuperPod Memorial & candlelight vigil, constructing a quilt of your favorite memories, and recognizing April 7 as Black Armband Day.  [DoSP]

DeFaria, Kipper –

The voice of Peppermint Patty.  [ep #44]

Denny’s –

1. The Bakersfield Riot (a copycat that took place during the LA Riots) consisted of a couple guys having a fist-fight here.  [ep #102]
2. A hangout spot for a shirtless 50 Cent & Floyd Mayweather.  [ep #103]

DGA –

The Hobotang’s alleged “Birthing Center” might be nothing more than the fountain outside of The Directors Guild of America in Los Angeles.  [ep #45]

Diabetes Happy Land –

What Disneyland is to people is what America is to Diabetes. Because we serve burgers where the bread is a grilled cheese sandwich, Hillary Clinton planned on choosing Wilford Brimley as a running mate.  [ep #110]

Diamond Jubilee –

1. The 60th Anniversay of The Queen, as explained by Jake Johannsen, undermining his purpose of selling tickets to his show.  [ep #107]  
2. Karen Kilgariff received an @ reply of “fuck you, cunt” after tweeting this was the name of her new dog.  [ep #107]

Diller, Phyllis –

Head of the Jugglers Union.  [ep #82]

Dirty & Kind –

Greg describes WTR as filthy, but not mean spirited.  Dave describes that as the saddest groundbreaking in the history of show business.  [ep #51]

Dirty Dancing –

(and Flashdance)
Greg has never seen either movie because, despite skewing girly, he has a cock.  [ep #89]

Dirty Santa Claus –

A Greg neighbor who’s all explanation and no story. He plays the bongos, makes album covers, and lives in a trailer on the property of an Alzheimer’s patient. He might be moving and Greg’s sad, though he doesn’t know his name. He’s the original Waffle Guy[ep #118]

Dirty Shit Finger –

Dave’s son earned this nickname when he started crying when Dave refused to smell his fingers after scratching his ass.  [ep #117]

Dixie Cup –

What 3 guys cum in before throwing the mixture onto another guy. This concept is WTR's pitch to Comedy Central.  [LC #1]

Dog Lady of Sunset –

The woman that roams Hollywood peeing freely and openly, much like a dog.   [ep #75]

Dollop –

1. When a male strip club closes for the night, the clean-up crew may stumble upon a seat with a dollop of a soft cheese left behind by a female patron. 
[ep #48]
2. Hobotang babies squirt out in this form at birth and then grow, or Sponge Monkey.  [ep #50]
3. When Greg reveals his sister happens to know the person that created the smiling dollop art, Dave declares dollops an issue that needn't come full-circle.  [ep #51]
4. Dave calls Greg a dollop of tar & shit that dropped out of a vagina, but Greg doesn’t even flinch; he hears all of Dave’s awful comments as compliments.  [ep #62]

Domain Names –

Gilmartin compulsively purchased them circa ‘96-’98. The websites he acquired included OldPeopleFucking.net & OldPeopleGettingItOn.net.  [ep #114]

Domesticated Anus –

Dave believes this is the true state of Greg’s buttle - broken down & weakened – unlike his own wild, free-range anus, or Wil’s, which has its own gravitational pull.  [ep #58]

Don't Ask Me What I've Been Up To –

What a face scar on an old friend you haven't seen in a while indicates.  [ep #96]

Don't Come At Me –

The warning to fans of plays at the top of every show.  [ep #96]

Don't Pick the Puddle of Brown Water –

The guys' next book. The title references bad relationships and bad seats on the subway.  [ep #94]

Don't Pull It Out Too Fast –

The guys from WTR & TOFOP are now national spokespeople for that warning – when your computer prompts you not to remove your SIM card, a cartoon version of their 4 faces pop up.  [DoSP]

Don't Punch People in a Car –

WTR & TOFOP joined forces to spread this message: Don't punch people through windows, whether you're on a motorcycle, or ever.  [ep #83]

Don’t Not Nope –

NOPE shirts now on sale[ep #117]

Dongle –

Justin was satisfied after he took it out & kicked it. Not a euphemism.  [ep #99]

Double Corndog –

(or DCD
Two fists up your asshole.  [ep #50]

Double Shamrock –

When two pasty, Irish, angry fucks release their buried feelings like a firehouse, get emotional, jerk off, and shoot each other in the head.  [ep #101]

Doug Loves Hallways –

1. The new Benson show that takes place in Dave's office and broke the story that Beyoncé & Jay Z named their baby after weed.  [ep #90] 2. Doug had thought tweets referencing hallways referred to his urging Edgar Wright to not say “corridor” on DLM.  [ep #116]

Doves –

Working on Rosie O’Donnell’s short-lived, highly-cancelled show on The O Network hurts, but it’s pretty – like these birds, pecking your eyes out.  [ep #100]

DP’s –

Dog Pills - pop em, get high as shit & go to a rave!  [ep #113]

Dr. Spite –

This guy hates people, hates medicine and hates curing people, but he's got a bet with Gary Stevens/Anderson to prove he's not a pussy. Tune in to Dr. Spite - CBS, Mondays at 9 - and find out what happens when the best revenge involves getting good grades.  [ep #78]

Drift –

The barnacles on Ben Stiller's dingy that are a lot of 'nobody wants'.  [ep #97]

Drifters –

Expendable Crime Weekend casualties that have a more sinister connotation than hobos, and with the exception of Michael Landon, they’re for killin’. 
[ep #40]

Drippers –

LA's only coffee bar & strip club.  [LC #1]

Drive –

Dave's choice if he could slow-fuck a movie.  [ep #84]

Drop Some Bass! –

What Fred Durst demands of guitarist Billy Morrison.  [ep #81]  (see alsoCamp Freddy)

Drucunt –

A drunk cunt.  [ep #69]

Druids –

The only religious people Dave is prejudiced against.  [ep #103]

Dude, This Sucks –

An MTV-style Gong Show.  [LC #2]

Dudes! Dudes! Dudes! –

As Michele Bachmann dropped out of the presidential race, her husband was chanting this - now he can do some fuckin' again.  [ep #87]

Dulli, Greg –

Dave's choice to test out his new vagina. While Wil & Greg chose Ryan Gosling & RDJ, respectively, Dave decided this Afghan Whig would be less intimidating and more in his league.  [ep #82]

Dumpster Mouth –

The way Nikki Glaser was portrayed in a revenge rap and the name of her future album.  [ep #92]

Duncan, Michael Clarke –

He'll play Wil in the film version of SuperPod because he seems like a magical guy that can help Tom Hanks piss again.  [DoSP]

Dune –

Trying to piece together WTR’s obscure language is comparable to trying to read this Frank Herbert sci-fi novel.  [ep #50]

Dunkin’ All Night –

The secret to the universe is right here in this Stephen Hawking biopic the studio turned into a brief history of hoops, starring Matthew McConaughey as the basketball playin’ Hawking.  [ep #66]

Dusty –

If you suck on a titty, will it dry out a pussy? A woman may ask you to stop if it makes downstairs turn this.  [ep #116]

Eagles –

These birds symbolic of America are so big, they eat bison.  [ep #103]

Earwolf –

1. WTR may have had a shot at being streamed from this network if Dave and Greg got in this to get on something, cleaned up their act and weren’t themselves.  [ep #62]
2. Dave was a judge on The Earwolf Challenge & kicked off Cuddlahs. 
[ep #67]

Ed Asner –

Slang term for when a guy is fucking you from behind and you feel his tits on your back.  [ep #68]

Editing the Room –

Short podcast hosted by Christian Evangelist Laramie Sprinkles that condenses each episode of Walking the Room down to the several minutes actually suitable for Christian listeners.  [ep #75]  

el Jefe –

(or el Hefe) The co-host of Walking the Room with famous book man Greg Behrendt. 
[ep #71]

Elephant –

1. Slaughtering this animal on-stage by beating it to death with Wolfie is the audiences preference to hearing new Van Halen material.  [ep #108]
2. Another description of a drunk non-prostitute’s “sawing bears in half” snore is this animal fucking a leaf blower, and Greg wishes that was a painting.  (see also: Tricks, Shepherd[ep #108] 

Elephon –

1. This elephant with wings & talons may soar above a Gryphon and use the lesser beast as a target to unleash its nary-before-seen shits.  Once covered, the Gryphon screams like a bitch as it plummets from the sky.  [ep #56]
2. Like Dave's career, there's trouble getting this off the ground; it just hovers 5 feet in the air.  [ep #58]
3. Using them to deliver the international SFC posters has caused major delays being that they fly 4 or 5 feet, then need to take a fucking nap.  [ep #61]
4. When he comes, thee is a shit-covered Gryphon.  [ep #100]

Elfin Ball Island –

(or Elf Cock Island)
Welcome to a world of magic & mystery, as narrated by British Dave Anthony! A world of forgotten winged elves, kept grounded by their disproportionately big balls (or, in females, descended pudendum).  [ep #56]

En Fuego –

1. The Roadhouse/Point Break era of Swayze’s career.  [ep #114] 2. How Greg was on Live Cuddle #5, starring him and supporting cast Dave & Bill Burr.  [ep #120]

Enema –

If you bring one into someone else's home with the intent to use it, please, make an effort to hide the purchase.  [LC #2]

Enya –

A metalhead on Greg's flight called him out for listening to her on his iPod. 
[ep #22]

Escalate the Conflict –

Dave's preferred method of handling a situation.  [ep #78]

Estoy Podcuddle –

Opening theme song lyric, translates to ‘I am Podcuddle.’  [ep #18 - present]

Exchange Rate –

In Australia, $10 worth of Dave Anthony is a bargain.  [DoSP]

Extreme Toenails –

The show Greg should be hosting in locations like Costa Rica, or while climbing up the side of a glacier. Followed by Total Outies, then Prolapsed Urethras.  [ep #96]

Extremely Loud, Incredibly Gross –

Wil's Broadway musical based on the Death of SuperPod.  [DoSP]

Eye Surgeons –

Since they could never do what comedians do, these doctors turn to them for tales of hardship & soul-searching.  [ep #98]

Eyes –

Facial feature Dave wishes could create death.  [ep #18]

Failonomics –

The book Dave is writing.  [ep #60]

Failure –

Greg turns down paid work because he's addicted to this.  [ep #78]

Fake Crab –

Greg declared this to be the official food of WTR.  Dave vetoed.  [ep #38]

Farnham, John –

Do NOT send Dave videos of Australia’s answer to Peter Cetera & Michael Bolton.  [ep #46]

Fart Stars –

What Dave sees after farting from laughing too hard because he's so close to death.  [LC #2]

Farts –

Greg believes they're blueprints for shits to come.  [ep #85]

Fast & the Furiouschwitz –

In part 6 of the series, Paul Walker & Vin Diesel use their time-traveling hot rods for good by wrapping chains around Auschwitz and towing it into Spain.  [ep #63]

Faygo –

1. A token Juggalo beverage.  [eps #16, #20 & #66]
2. Bus tickets and a few cases of this soft drink will get Greg & Dave to your next family gathering, high school gym or a tree fort.  [ep #23]  They’ll also consider making appearances for BBQ, coleslaw or chili Dave can tea bag.  [ep #26]

Fear Came –

Patton ejaculated out of pure panic when lightning struck nearby while he was having sex on a rooftop during a thunderstorm.  [ep #100]

Fecal Gold –

The 80's action series from the makers of Rip Tide and Miami Vice.  [LC #2]

Find a Cat & a Ride –

The process most Dave Anthony fans must complete in order to get to one of his live shows.  [ep #49]

Fire –

Dave’s son is only serious around this.  [ep #104]

Fire Em Up –

When you get someone drunk, fire them, then after their grayout, you fire them again.  [ep #96]

Firefox –

Brendon Walsh envisions it to be a Godzilla enemy.  [LC #1]

Fireman Jim –

Greg & Dave’s name for Jim Carey’s In Living Color character, Fire Marshall Bill.  [ep #104]

Fisting Motion –

Don't make this while you're talking about Dave's lady.  [ep #92]

Flash –

He has tiny little heart attacks all the time, like Cheney.  [ep #97]

Flat Black –

The color of Jamie Kennedy's Bentley.  [ep #87]

Flatocock –

(aka Soft Flat, Behrendt Slug or Daddy's Tapeworm)
1. A master of soft penetration, Greg punts when he fucks, and has been known to lay down his flat & soft, a shape which allows him to pull his cock out like tape.  [ep #84]
2. Dave's wife thinks they've crossed the line with the flat dick talk, so Greg vows they'll talk more about round dicks later.  [ep #87]

Flatopotamus –

The toy Dave accidentally left on his head during a drive through Hollywood and a trip into Gelson's.  [ep #84]

Flawless –

Every career move Wil has made other than WTR.  [ep #82]

Flesh Eating Bacteria –

Occurs with no rhyme or reason, and it happens in a flash – you can catch it from anywhere, including zip lines, your lawn, and hobos. It does not surface as a little blue guy that announces himself.  [ep #104]

Flocking to Him for a Fuck Party –

Dave's rationale for why a rock star wouldn't need to send dick pics cross-country while on the road.  [ep #80]

Floppers –

(or Flobotang)
1. People that jump in front of moving cars to collect insurance money. 
[ep #42]
2. People who intentionally slip in stores, and when it’s pulled off with an accomplice, it’s a Knock & Flop.  [ep #42]
3. If you open your front door while a woman is slumped against it, crying, you may allow impostor step-moms to flop in.  [ep #43]
4. Dave's landlord worries Linus & the Witch Nose might “slip” on an outdoor toy & sue out of spite.  [ep #81]

Folk Cast –

Dave and Greg’s American folk hero status guarantee that WTR will be played in Iowa Community Centers 30 years from now.  [ep #64]

Foodboy –

Foodie Can’t Fail! A guy that loves Jamaican jerk chicken. Foodie CANNOT fail, that’s the thing about it.  [ep #73]

Foot Fuck Me Magazine –

Greg bragged about being their "Nearly 50 Foot of the Month" until Dave pointed out it was their special "Rape Feet" issue.  [ep #75]

Forts & the In-Between –

1. Four over-privileged white neo-twee hippies that seek donations to fund their cross-country fort-building journey.  [ep #45]
2. Greg & Dave are in a fort, and they simply don’t get it; by not participating, they are.  [ep #45]
(see also: Reverse Mustache)  

Fosters –

Australians, please, RELAX!  This beer is fine, ok?  Jesus Christ!  [ep #47]

Freckle Talk –

Show on the WTR Podcast Network recounting the historical events of Amelia Earhart’s skin care program.  [ep #107]

Fried Green Tomatoes –

Greg wants to make this food while watching this movie with Paul Gilmartin.  [ep #73]

Friendship Rape –

Greg likens WTR to being in prison, and the cuddle is a way to kill time before he rapes Dave…with friendship.  This idea helped develop the strategy of diffusing prison rape by busting into an impromptu theatrical song narration of the rape as it occurs in real time.  [ep #38]

Frosted-Tipped Douche –

1. You might think Greg Behrendt is a frosted-tipped douche. That’s it.  [ep #16]
2. Greg's haircut can be polarizing. Women want to be with it, men want to be it.  [DoSP] 
3. A Dr. Seuss story they're making into a 3D movie.  [DoSP]

Fruit Stripe Gum –

1. Greg proved to be a marketer's wet dream by purchasing this gum for its shiny, metallic packaging and the chance to go to the fruit circus.  [ep #27]
2. Dave Holmes thinks the standard CFTND attire resembles this.  [LC #2]

Fuck Dave –

Fictitious Comedy Central prank show that entails Dave being repeatedly set up to believe he's landed a writing job at the network.  Currently in production, ongoing.  [ep #37]

Fuck Internationally –

AA Reps that visit schools to combat underage drinking often teach teens this is a drunk possibility through cautionary tales depicting them as high-five-worthy legends. [ep #98]

Fuck Men Parties –

When women get together on Valentines Day despite being single; not to be confused with the parties where women get together, buy themselves a dude, and fuck him.  [ep #90]

Fuck Pie –

1.  Facebook[ep #60]
2.  The Chateau in Los Angeles.  [ep #96]

Fuck Tokens –

The coins female brothel workers might hand you after a show if they like your act.  [ep #107]

Fuck You, You Suck –

Dave was tweeted this and needed to further investigate to see if it was from a fan.  [ep #115]

Fuckbox Charlie –

A box you can put your dick in made of half caramel and half vaginas, and when you look inside, there’s an elf.  [ep #42]

Full Pete Rose Style –

Greg’s method of dress. He lays his sweaters out down the hall and dives right in, head first, like he’s sliding into home.  [ep #104]

Full-Crowe –

People in Hollywood ‘go this’ when they throw things at their Phone Bitch, which we in LA know is allowed by the FBC (Phone Bitch Clause).  [ep #70]

Fun & Fearless Males 2009 –

This Cosmo list included Greg Behrendt & Patrick Dempsey.  [ep #42]

FUPA –

Fat upper-pussy with a cloven hoof look.  [ep #56]

Game of Thrones –

Greg didn’t get it and tuned out, but it’s right up Dave’s alley, and he watches, cumming, naked, covered in honey, licking it off his hands (…the HONEY).  [ep #106]

Gang Pyramid –

The $25,000 Pyramid rebooted to sound like The Housewives of Beverly Hills – it’s just a group of people shouting clues at each other and cheering. Winners get a TP at Tony’s Pizza with half-cheese.  [ep #110]

Garbage Trucking –

A fetish that involves building model garbage trucks naked, with a hard-on, but not jerking-off.  [ep #65]

Gary #7 –

Or Jonah Ray. The Nerdist podcast is really about a guy who doesn’t get to talk as much as the other guys. Like a Bond Henchman, this is Jonah’s story, and it’s very real to him.  [ep #62]

Gary Olson –

Greg insisted this – and not Buttercup - was a great dog name, until his daughter cried inconsolably.  [ep #84]

Gate –

1. Always mysteriously propped open at Dave’s apartment complex, even after he had a check stolen.  [ep #18]
2. After chasing a crack head off the property, Dave left a note and locked it once and for all.  [ep #38]
3. It was later discovered that Crickets had been the one leaving the gate open to let Bill freely roam the neighborhood.  [ep #38]

Gay Boys –

The hairless gym with a No Clothes Policy on Homosexual Blvd where men get oiled prior to the dance party. Ernesto mans the squeegee.  [ep #70]

Gay Male Skinheads Fucking in the Park –

If you see this while hallucinating from a safe distance away, DO NOT break into applause when they've completed the act. You have NOT been watching clowns practice a performance, despite the confetti lube.  [ep #99]

GB Hello –

Greg's new greeting where he comes in close, lines the nipples up, then brings it in tight for a nip-to-nip tuck.  [ep #97]

Gentleman Situation –

When guys are naked, it always turns into that - with top hats, monocles, bow ties & fancy cars.  [LC #2]

Get Ahold of Gilmartin –

What you need to do when in search of an expert in subjects like podcasting, domain names, growing pot, wine, playing a Republican, wood work or juggling.  [ep #114]

Get Away From Me –

What a 50+ British woman said to Greg while getting yelled at by him in CVS after nearly hitting him in the parking lot. Dave said the phrase would’ve made him unleash on the woman and then pour syrup or jelly all over her windshield.  [ep #111]

Get the Manager –

The play Greg put on when he turned CVS into his theater.  [ep #111]

Get Your Fingers in There –

The first chapter in Dave Anthony’s pantsless PowerPoint course on How to Fuck.  [ep #107]

Ghost of Asshole Future –

When a serial killer targets drunk Greg and the woman he’s banging from behind while simultaneously puking into a can, he could’ve explained the situation in court and been found innocent. But then, this man from the future shows up and whispers, “he’s going to write a very important book.” Turns out Greg will know if a guy is into you if he just throws up on your back.  [ep #120]

Ghost Protocol –

WTR is like the CIA – they'll hand out the plan, but if you get caught, you're burned on Hotdog Thunderdome, the tapes are destroyed and you can't snitch.  [ep #87]

Giant Eyebrows –

Adam Carolla.  [ep #102]

Gibbons –

The monkey/corpse that invented Grape Nuts and gets fucked at Man Camp.  [ep #64]

Gingerbread Prison –

1. When Dave became enraged by Kevin Anderson’s gift of dark chocolate, Greg hoped he would get Dark Chocolate Raped here.  [ep #29 ]
2. Greg’s post-WTR stand-up career uses lines like, “turkey fucked in a gingerbread prison” to describe a filling holiday meal, much to John Oliver’s delight.  [ep #35] 
3. Hurt til it Eats and don’t stop until it feels like you’ve been turkey raped here.  [ep #45]

Glarry –

(or Gary
Gay Larry  [ep #96]

Glass Eggs –

In the BBC’s girl/gay guy best friend romantic comedy open-air office setting, bigwigs hover around in these, while the rest of the employees are seated as if it were lunch, but it’s work.  [ep #110]

Glaze that Frown –

1. What Brian Posehn assured the live audience he’d still do to Denise Richards after describing her as really pretty, but really frowny at the same time.  [ep #101]
2. The statement immediately became Posehn’s catchphrase, was sold on lighters, and made both Entertainment Weekly & Time Magazine’s Quotes of the Week.  [ep #101]   
3. A donut shop slogan suggesting a soft donut – not for kids, for people - will glaze your frown and turn it upside down.  [ep #101]

Glitter Done –

This effeminate spin on Larry the Cable Guy is the cuddle's official sign-off.  [ep #22 - present]

Glue –

What you smell like when you don't drink the right amount.  [ep #92]

Gluten –

4 days off of it, Greg’s in a manic phase.  [ep #104]

Glutenous Free Maximus –

Greg’s new name based on the gluten-free lifestyle he shares with Dave’s wife.  [ep #109]

Go Alabama –

To shoot someone directly with a hose.  [ep #90]

Go Baggy –

If you’re a fat dude with big stuff happening, don’t wear a tight shirt – do this and don’t bother anybody.  [ep #116]

Go Fuck Yourself –

Paul Gilmartin’s first hearty phrase spoken on the cuddle.  [ep #73]

Go-Away Coupons –

What you receive when you pointlessly complain. Usually 20% off.  [ep #76]

Goat It Up, Brotha! –

Should you see a man traveling amongst a herd of goats while dressed in a homemade goat costume with fake horns, shout this at him to should you approve. Otherwise, when he realizes you’ve spotted him, he’ll feel self-conscious, sit down & sulk.  [ep #117]

Goats –

Animals enjoyed by the overly-intoxicated petting zoo crowd and, most likely, the listener.  [ep #71]

Gold’s Gym –

If you’re a fat guy caught jerking off, you’re arrested for a double-felony. If you’re a skinny guy caught jerking off, you’re given a ticket for being awesome redeemable for 50% off for the month at this establishment.  [ep #109]

Goo Goo Foo 2 For Weekend –

Radio promotion giving away Goo Goo Dolls & Foo Fighters tickets and $10,000 in party cash.  [LC #1]

Good Luck With Your Thing –

What a podcast might as well be called because we're not in a golden age.  [DoSP]

Grammar Nazi –

Ronnie Schiller. She believes not every sentence has to start with “And”.  [ep #93]  (see also: Bag Full of Fingers)

Grandpa Bat –

(or GB, Gary Busey)  
Old, sick or dying but NOT first-tier family? Then put em down! Take em out from behind, smack em in the back of the head. Say goodbye, than GB right on down with a pop on the noggin.   [ep #76]

Gratatouille –

When you're grateful for many things, including Patton.  [ep #78]

Gravity –

It’s not a toy. Don’t play games with it.  [ep #104]

Gray’s Papaya –

Famous NYC hotdoggery. Be sure to give the homeless man out front a wide birth while he scratches his genital sauce – it could pop.  [ep #60]

Grease Up –

Doing this anytime you need to get into a tight, sweet hole helps prevent unnoticed death caused by Santa Clausin’.  [ep #67]

Great Wet Bun Explosion of 1984 –

Greg’s friends forced his childhood girlfriend & her family to peel urine-soaked hamburger buns off their home after a mailbox full of M80’s & said wet buns blew up, causing this incident.  [ep #55]

Green Turtle –

A hippie version of a Greyhound, with beds. It’s a Rape Bus, sans permé.  [ep #104]

Greggae –

1. Greg’s Jamaican character that rattles off Kingston-style phrases and acknowledges he’s not the Gryphon you were expecting.  [ep #58]
2. Greg shouts this prior to his splurt.  [ep #72]
3. It makes Jen Kirkman turn the radio down.  [LC #1]

Greico, Richard –

Dave doubts listeners are 21 Jump Street savvy enough to know he exists. 
[ep #18]

Grey Lady –

1. Diet Coke.  [ep #64]
2. Penguins sometimes try to flee their island in pursuit of one with diamonds.  [ep #67]

Grey Tuna –

1. After Dave’s wife recovered from being sick, she immediately relapsed after eating this at Subway.  [ep #38]  
2. Greg equates WTR to the grey tuna of podcasting.  [ep #38]

Greyhound –

Despite a man stabbing and eating a passenger back in ’08, their stock is up.  [ep #104]

Grip Em Ups –

1. A kegel exercise for men; you attach a weight to a stick with a ball on the end – you lean down, grab the ball with your walnut, and lift the weight. When done routinely in front of your home, they help preserve tightness and prevent robbery.  [ep #51]
2. Domesticate your asshole! Don’t come home with a feral buttle if you can Grip Em Up!  [ep #61]
3. When they go public, the IPO is projected around $55 - more than Facebook.  [ep #105]

Groomsmen –

A Mustache Grooming Shop in Silver Lake.  [ep #94]

Gryphon –

1. Greg fantasizes about having the ability to momentarily turn into a fire-breathing Gryphon that burns the shit out of Dave.  [ep #41]
2. WTR is upon you like this mythical creature [ep #43 & #45] that Dave defines as “a stupid lion with wings.”  [ep #46]
3. Dave & Greg have debated what a Gryphon should sound like [ep #44] and it's proper spelling.  [ep #52]
4. A sad beast, by nature.  [ep #53]
5. Dave calls it closet hate - a cunt of an animal that shouldn’t exist - and people only like it because it upsets him.  [ep #58]
6. The Gaddafi of the animal world is Pardo’s son’s middle name.  [ep #65]
7. Greg is tired of explaining that his feet are Gryphon claws.  [ep #71]
8. Greg doesn't understand why Dave hates it so much.  [ep #99]
9. When Greg takes his dick out, the clouds part, it’s upon us & there’s so much joy in the kingdom.  [ep #102]

Guess the Cock –

If you can tell which one's Greg's and which one's Dave's, you win Starfish Brooklyn tickets.  [ep #86]

Guests –

Occasionally people want to play Russian roulette with their career and request to enter the closet.  [ep #35]
Those Cuddlahs include:
1.  Wil Anderson  [eps #33, #34, #40, #58, #66, #82#83 & DoSP]
2.  Charlie Clausen  [eps #40, #66 & DoSP]
3.  Brian Posehn  [eps #44#54 & #101]
4.  Angelo Warner  [ep #48]
5.  Karen Kilgariff  [eps #49 & #100]
6.  Patton Oswalt  [eps #50, #54, #81, LC #2 & #100]
7.  Jonah Ray  [ep #62]
8.  Jimmy Pardo  [ep #65]
9.  Kyle Kinane  [ep #69]
10. Paul Gilmartin  [eps #73, #101, & #114]11. Jen Kirkman  [LC #1]
12. Brendon Walsh  [LC #1]
13. Rob Delaney  [ep #87]
14. Dave Holmes  [LC #2]
15. Nikki Glaser  [ep #92]
16. Dana Gould  [ep #95]
17. David O'Doherty  [ep #98]
18. Justin Hamilton  [ep #99]
19. Matt Besser  [ep #112] 20. Doug Benson  [ep #116]

Gunther –

The German porn star that only releases videos of him choking himself out in front of his family.  [ep #101]

Guts ouT –

The clothing line for the large.  [ep #116]

Gutterheads –

An insult Dave blurted out because he’s so bad at saying words, he’s already 90 yelling at kids on the street.  [ep #101]

Guyland –

A guy island with Brotel vacancies often inhabited by the cool students from Pardo's gym class.  [ep #65]

Gym Rules –

They establish that it's not gay if you're on top.  [LC #1]

Gym Stories –

The show that only discusses the gym or guys named Jim.  [ep #116]

Hair Helmet –

Greg's junior year pre-mullet hairstyle that went long in the back.  [ep #97]

Hal Linden Alive –

The text appearing on billboards so people know – also the name of his Vegas show, so it's a confirmation of both things.  [ep #96]

Half Johnson –

Case law involving flying bodies is sparse; however, some precedents have been set not only by Half Johnson, but also Los Angeles' groundbreaking Shoulder vs Curtis Jenkins of 1968, and the following:
2/3 Benson vs 2/3 Anthony
John Doe Shoulder vs Hopkins
Half-Face vs Larry Flanders
Flatolamb vs Half a Dude  [ep #84]

Half-Off Hard-On Sales –

Greg assumes this must have been going on in the department store where a guy in the bathroom was looking at Dave's cock.  [ep #88]

Hall, Anthony Michael –

“He’s not a bad actor; he’s fine. Get off his dick, dude,” was said to Dave by 2 middle-aged men in a closet in defense of this actor.  [ep #114]

Hamburger Stars –

The focus of VH1’s Has-Been Burger Stars include Dave Thomas & the “Where’s the Beef?” lady from Wendy’s, Herb from Burger King, and most famously, Rodney Allen Rippy, who was a Hamburger Star in the 70’s.  [ep #119]

Hamsters –

When a bunch fall from the sky, hit pillows and giggle, delighted, then form two large arms that wrap around you, hug you tight and whisper, “I care about you,” THAT’S Walking the Room post-100: It’s a whole new ball game, and now they’re all about super-positivity and the wonderment of being alive.  [ep #102]

Hangers –

Signed prize given out to listeners for a keepsake or abortion.  If WTR replies to your comment with ‘Hanger!’ you’ve won!  Email walkingtheroom@gmail.com to claim your prize.  [ep #29]  When you win one, you’ve got more nothing than you had before, and now you have something to hang nothing on!  [ep #30]

Hanks, Jim –

He’s Tom Hanks’ brother, but don’t mention that to him.  [ep #62]

Hard On Troll –

This troll with the giant hard-on offered to watch the secret-stash of pornos while a young Dave Anthony & friends were in class. Years later, they came to find out he was just a pedophile homeless man named Robert Bynam, a former school teacher performing the first-ever improv.  [ep #112]

Harvey –

Wil Anderson’s “how great is all this?” attitude that consists of being delighted, pleasant to everyone, and perpetually high for the first time is reminiscent of this movie, only he’s with a rabbit & he’s a drunk.  [ep #103]

Harvey, Steve –

If you say “Steve Harvey” and you’re a white guy, it’s racist. That’s just the rule.  [ep #101]

Hate Cage –

Greg wants to put Dave in this and fuck him. That’s it.  [ep #61]

Haticle –

(or Hate Canticle)
When both hosts talk simultaneously, with two different stories going over & under each other, while no is listening, not even the listener.  [ep #32]

Hats & Doors Movie –

The Adjustment Bureau.  [ep #63]

Have a Lovely Time with Babies –

What an international star may opt to do instead of continuing a money-making venture.  [ep #98]

HBO Stuff –

A network that steals and broadcasts HBO’s programming, like Stitcher.  [ep #106]

He Does Not Like You –

French translation of He's Just That Into You. The book didn't sell there because French men don't have a problem saying 'fuck off'. Not to say it goes well – sometimes women retaliate by calling in a bomb threat after being unfriended on Facebook.  [ep #86]

He IS That Into You –

If a guy’s peeing on you…  [ep #117]

He's Good, He's Good, He's Good, He's Dead –

When it's Greg's time to wrap it up, he doesn't want anyone filled in on the play-by-play. He wants roses, roses, roses, skulls, and when he's melting, only Dave can be at his bedside, because that's when they'll do some real podcasting.  [ep #86]

Heaven Buildings –

Apartment buildings that don't allow children.  [ep #75]

He’s Just Not That Indian –

Greg’s daughter thought that’s what the name of his book was – Dave thinks it should have been. The title indicates that he’s not Indian enough, as opposed to he’s not that specific Indian.  [ep #108]

Hef –

Dave couldn’t bring himself to announce Hugh Hefner as ‘Hef,’ which Greg found odd – he calls him Hughbee.  [ep #25]

Helen –

Greg’s daughter’s imaginary friend that won’t play with her. Like the time when they were supposed to buy prom dresses, but Helen decided not to go – Classic Helen.  [ep #108]

Helter Skelter –

This was Dave’s bedtime story as a child, and his lawyer father had him think about how to approach Manson’s defense.  [ep #49]

Her Pussy’s like a Train on Fire –

This quote about Scarlett Johansson will appear on The Avengers poster, along with the line, “Joss Whedon does it again!” (She doesn’t mind it, but she doesn’t know what it means.)  [ep #100]

Her Shit Popped Open –

The way to describe a female having a heart attack at The Heart Attack Café.  [ep #104]

Hey, What’s Your Name? –

What Dave calls Paul Gilmartin’s podcast, The Mental Illness Happy Hour[ep #101]

Hey-Oh! –

Yell this and wink when you get an erection during a sex scene with Naomi Watts [ep #40] or when someone plummets to their death off The Eiffel Tower due to flying cape failure.  [ep #66]

Hide & Sack –

The game where you put red paint on your balls, drag them around the house, and have your wife use your snail-trail to find you.  [ep #90]

Hide the Sack –

The game Greg plays with himself. He tucks it and asks 'where'd it go?' which makes his wife swell with pride.  [LC #1]

Hide your Sperm –

This year's new game – hide it ANYWHERE!  [ep #84]

Hill, Jonah –

He won't be at the 100th episode at Meltdown because he was never invited. Because he's a movie star. Pitt, Clooney & Seth Rogen won't be there either.  [ep #94]

Hippie Fabric –

Greg thinks his daughter may be made up of this, along with cartwheels & hugs.  [ep #79]

Hobotang –

proper noun:
1. Dave’s orange-stealing neighbor that devolved from Hobo Guy to Hobo Orangutan Dad to Hobotang due to his affinity for climbing the neighbors’ tree [eps #22 & #66] while his son is occupied with Dave’s son’s toys.  [ep #30]  (see: Oranges)
2. Hobotang typically refers specifically to the man of the Hobo Family, which consists of a (then) pregnant wife and a two-and-a-half year old son. They live off Amway & pyramid schemes [eps #22 & #66], but drive a Mercedes, own properties in Ohio, and have a $50K investment pending. 
[ep #38]
3. Walls and people’s possessions mean nothing, but when you respond to his behavior, YOU’RE the asshole.  [ep #30]
4. Allows Hobo Kid, his dirty baby, to wander around at night, shirtless
[ep #17], shoeless and screaming in the streets.  [eps #22 & #66]
5. Asked if he could have the motorcycle stored in Dave’s garage.  TWICE.  [eps #25 & #30]
6. He shined on a baby.  [ep #36]
7. Hobotang let Hobotang Mom drive home from the Birthing Center a mere TWO HOURS after giving birth because he “didn’t feel very well.”  [ep #45]
8. Hobo Mom wouldn't let him shake his coin pockets until he got a haircut.  [ep #50]
9. To ensure his son is sound asleep by 1:30am, he deprives the child of naps.  [ep #55]
10. They put all their money in silver, but pulled out to invest in their latest venture - A French Fry Store that serves a variety of fry entrees with an optional side of mini-burgers.  [ep #60]
11. His wife Hobo Mom, a Day Trader with no knowledge of ghostwriting, “rolls over and pops a tit in [her son’s] mouth” when he wakes in the night, crying.  [ep #68]
12.  He’s discovered the key to a large HoboBaby is breast milk & feeding him like a dog. Just put your baby on the ground, throw him scraps of what you’re eating, and you’re raisin’ pigeon, bro.  [ep #101]
13. When HoboKid shits on the lawn, he demands to leave it there so he can watch the flies eat it. Hobotang complies.  [ep #108] 14. They moved on 9/9/12, the same date TOFOP ended. Lest we forget this sad day in podcast history.  [ep #120]
noun:
15. A cagey, passive-aggressive thief that most likely resembles a drifter. 
[ep #41]
16. A person that has a bum-like quality while living a structured life.  They follow a general code; some red flags include boxing your leftovers and borrowing DVD’s with no intention of returning them.
[ep #46]
17. These able-bodied freeloaders are almost exclusively white.  [ep #50]
18. Their medical advice for treating baby cuts is to apply superglue to the wound.  Paint thinner and tar are also acceptable substitutes.  [ep #57]
19. The “Junior” variety engage in unsuccessful attempts at tangin' that result in alcohol cut-and-runs, and wear unmatching sweat suits with nondescript wet pants.  [ep #57]
20. They take more than their share – they take their half out of the middle.  [ep #59] 
21. Surgeons can be upper-crust hobotang, using their life-saving skills to justify their entitlement.  [ep #59]
22. Repo Man is the ultimate hobotang career.  [ep #60]
23. The Santa Ana Winds are the catalyst for a hobotang holiday because “everything's on the ground”. This theory explains why they think Post-Katrina New Orleans is the place to be.  [ep #81]
24. These people exist, and they’re in your lives, too – they’re above-ground bums that take your shit and you have to Beware the Hobotang.  [ep #108]
verb:
25. Greg admits that before he got it together, he hobotanged a little bit.  [ep #46]

Hobotang Pie –

Since hobotangs hibernate in the winter and don't come outdoors in the cold, they bake fallen fruit (apple & lime makes orange) for sustenance.  [ep #81]

Holdotangs –

Hobotangs that grab it, keep it and lock it up – including objects like the popular children's toy Rag Bag, the bag full of rags.  [ep #91]

Holmes, Dave –

He out-Walking-the-Roomed Greg & Dave at the Live Podcuddle in San Francisco by telling The Best Story Ever Told on the Show.  [ep #89]

Home DepBros –

1. The group of guys that travel together for Home Depot conventions.  [ep #94]
2. They've replaced air marshals on planes to stop planking passengers and stewardesses off their meds.  [ep #94]

Honky –

Dave's white childhood dog that went missing while his black neighbors were dog-sitting, forcing them to shout the name throughout the neighborhood.  [ep #84]

Hoo Tiny –

A small, buff dude that’s not an official Hooters employee, but is willing to tackle a dine-and-ditcher to defend their wait staff - he’s little, but he’s got a boot.  [ep #55]

Horse Ending –

Death by horse cock caught on tape. Greg's not gonna let it end by letting the horse fuck him; he's gonna slit it open, take off his clothes, climb inside it & take some photographs. It might end this way for Dave unless they team up to kill the horse with their cocks.  [ep #80]

Horse Head –

Dave is going to put on this rubber mask to mingle with the crowd undetected before live podcasts.  [ep #103]

Horse Heads –

Dave's going to start sending these out to let people know when he hates things.  [ep #88]

Horse-Sized Duck –

Dave will master, tame & ride this beast to compete with Greg's Tiny Horse Rodeo.  [ep #91]

Hot Chocolate Backpack –

1. There's your band name.  [ep #95]
2. Something you do not want in prison.  [ep #95]
3. Dave's prison nickname.  [ep #95]

Hot Cock Puppy –

Don’t roll up the windows & leave your Viagra Buddy in the car with a bag of ice – call a doctor.  [ep #118]

Hot For Teacher –

The intro to this song, followed by D-Day barreling in on a motorcycle and playing his neck, is the sound of Walking the Room.  [ep #101]

Hotdog Thunderdome –

1. The children's area in the Westside Mall food court which boasts a giant foam hot dog for fun and unattended cups of scalding hot coffee for injury.  [ep #18]  
2. Walking the Room's Jonestown – a Cuddlah social-networking site.  [ep #76]  
3. The Walking the Room social network just for Cuddlahs, so the people on Facebook don't know how awful you are.  [ep #77]
4. Join Hotdog Thunderdome to participate in the next live chat or to read what other Cuddlahs are posting!  [ep #81]
5. In the HDTD, you must fight the hotdog & beat it before you can have it.  [ep #83]
6. When Dave returned to the namesake, his son pissed & shit himself while hiding from monsters in the shoeless commune of tiny, tiny hippies.  [ep #100]
7. It’s no fucking joke, bro – it gets real in there. Sometimes you get pissed on.  [ep #100] 8. Keith Earickson is single-handedly keeping the dome alive.  [ep #120]

How Bout This? –

Sears' clothing line of burlap sacks for the poor.  [ep #86]

How to Fuck Your Pony –

Superpod International presents this Walking the Room instructional video on the technique and janitorial aspects of fucking a decent-sized altered, stuffed My Little Pony. You might not want to cum in it unless you purchase the MLP Cleaning Kit, a pony douche situation sold separately.  [ep #106]

Huddles is a Junkie –

What drunk Greg & his friend would yell at the mascot every second of a 49ers game until people left.  [ep #119]

Huggalos –

Dan Dion's suggested 'Cuddlah' alternative.  [LC #2]

Human Flesh Slices –

When they’re melted on graham crackers with chocolate, take a bite and that’s Walking the Room.  [ep #110]

Human Scavenger Hunt –

You're given an organ you have to put back. A human kidney in an Igloo cooler is presented to a guest. The guest must figure out who it belongs to and reattach it. Clues will be given, and the organ owner's insides will be filled with cash prizes.  [ep #86]

Humble –

Nothing about Greg is remotely this.  [ep #69]

Humpty Dumpty –

The egg from the nursery rhyme where the egg fell down.  [ep #113]

I Am Skipping –

1. What Greg’s 10-year-old daughter says aloud to describe what she’s doing in a blissfully happy moment.  [ep #106]
2. She’d be a horrible zombie, revealing herself by repeating “I’m eating people, I’m eating people."  [ep #106]

I Do Do Shit –

Greg insists that he participates in his small business, even though Angelo does 99% of the work.  [ep #115]

I Don't Know What You're Doing –

(or Guess Who's Coming to Dinner or Why Are You Looking At Me)
Nikki Glaser's podcast.  [ep #92]

I Don't Own a Home Tan –

When skin has that leathery, beef-jerky look.  [ep #26]

I Know What I’m Supposed to Think About –

Greg’s new byline.  [ep #104]

I Was Attracted To His Rapping –

Nikki Glaser found this to be a valid reason to date a “nice” guy.  [ep #92]

I Will Rape You with My Mouth –

Dave’s comeback to a heckler that basically reads as a blow job offer. 
[ep #43]

I'm Next –

Phrase you whisper to a mother breast-feeding in public if you want to hobotang a hit.  [ep #79]

I'm Sorry –

Greg's daughter is so sweet that she said this to a girl on the soccer field after gaining control of the ball.  [ep #89]

I-5 Paper Flicker Death Cult –

The gang covered on Dateline NBC – they've lost people, and it all happens in Starbucks, so be careful with your trash.  [LC #2]

I’ll Be In in a Minute –

What a strange man smoking outside Greg’s house said to him before vanishing. Greg replied ‘ok’ and left the door unlocked.  [ep #74]

I’m Lookin’ at the Pink, Bro! –

1. Dave explains that he pays no mind to donkey show costumes - he’s zoned in on the cock.  [ep #60]
2. Dave’s son calls pink “the dick color.”  [ep #109]

I’m Ready to See Axel –

The phrase meaning you’re ready to take a shit.  [ep #117]

Ice Cream –

1. It’s Dave’s sweet, sweet lady of instant regret when things aren’t going well. And it’s cold, when many treats are just regular.  [ep #70]
2. Dave reached a whole new level of ice cream when snoring-after-eating got him sentenced to sleeping on the couch.  [ep #71]

Ice Cream Man –

The Van Halen song playing live while David Lee Roth showed a video of his dogs.  [ep #108]

Ideas For Meals –

When Dave asked Gilmartin if the Dinner & a Movie producers ever asked him to come up with these, Apple stock dipped, there was a creak in Steve Jobs’ casket, and people just tuned out of podcasts in general.  [ep #114]

Idiot Shivers –

When you witness or hear about somebody doing something so stupid or uncomfortable it makes YOU shake.  [ep #82]

If You Took –

1. Recurring episode lead-in bit. When Greg thought the era was over, Dave explained it's just on hiatus, but regardless, Greg can never do it again.  [ep #77]
2. Patton can't get through his because he's an overly excited Tire Fire.  [ep #81]
3. The new face for 2'12 is the smell of flowers & bunny together.  [ep #84]

IHV –

Independent hood vagina (a car accessory).  [ep #60]

Imagination –

Greg masturbates while fantasizing about this – his own imagination.  [ep #112]

Indie –

The type of podcast that Walking the Room used to be.  [ep #78]

Initial Public Opening –

Greg’s IPO involves offering his anus to people.  [ep #105]

Insane Clown Posse –

1. Retarded clowns on ecstasy.  [ep #17]
2. Horror rap thematically aligned with Eminem, Ringling Brothers & Cirque du Soleil.  [ep #20]
3.
Violent rap clowns-turned-Christians [ep #20] who then attempted to renege on religion when it didn’t sell.  [ep #38]4. White trash won the lottery & spent the money making stuff.  [ep #113]
(see also: Juggalos, Miracles, Vanilla Ice)

Interview with a Vampire –

From the makers of Chat with a Werewolf and Skype with a Zombie[ep #54]

Israel –

1. Dave got it seeds on its birthday.  [ep #103]
2. Dave’s son has a flag and fake passport to this country.  [ep #103]

It’s Not My Fault –

You can yell this or blame liquors individually, but if you’ve been drinking since 7am, or if you’re drunk on tequila, it’s 100% your fault.  [ep #108]

Jamie Kennedy’s Cock Stories –

Greg doesn’t love any story where someone’s cock is in peril, so he did not see this Broadway show.  [ep #118]

Japanese Straightening System –

The process Richard Simmons underwent to iron out the squiggles and achieve his Super Smooth Sack.  [ep #111]

Jason Yellow –

Besser’s character that’s deaf, blind & armless.  [ep #112]

Jazz Drumming –

A future podcuddle will only feature this for 3 segments.  [ep #97]

Jazzercise –

1. Greg’s never jerked off watching it, but has jerked off doing it.  [ep #112]   
2. Besser calls it Jackercise, and it’s a good way to burn calories.  [ep #112] 
3. The subject of Perfect, a film starring John Travolta & Jamie Lee Curtis.  [ep #112]

Jeb Bush –

A style of well-cropped pubes.  [ep #61]

Jellyfish –

Greg threw one at his daughter and it stung her, ruining her modeling career.  [ep #68]

Jen Kirkman Tweet –

1. When Dave went off on a heckler, Greg likened his explosive reaction to the tweets of comedian/Cuddlah @jenkirkman.  [ep #43]
2. If you love to watch a Twitter fight, be it Kirkman or Maron, you will enjoy @iamcolinquinn.  [ep #107] 3. She takes no breaks from twitter fights – she’s on 24/7.  [ep #115]

Jerk-Off Pillow –

The pillow that you slide your dick under and hump like a lady.  [ep #103]

Jesse Thorn's Cock –

Greg's sure it's enormous & really smart.  [ep #80]

Jet Ski –

If you ask a guy at a bar if he wants to do this, Dave thinks it translates into doing blow, while Greg thinks it implies a blow job.  [ep #103]

John Carter –

The movie that came with its own sense of 'don't come'.  [ep #97]

Johnny Logistic –

Dave can’t understand why Doug suddenly turned into this guy – the guy attempting to realistically figure out the sleeve-length needed to safely handle a squirrel.  [ep #116]

Joke Killer –

This wasn’t Courteney Cox’s nickname, and Greg didn’t hear that from anyone on the staff of Friends.  [ep #61]

Jorts –

Jean Shorts. More specifically, tight denim cut-offs. Nowadays, a bro’ll wear a jort & nobody cares.  [ep #115]

Juggalone –

When your clown mask is on and you're by yourself.  [ep #94]

Juggalos –

1. These followers of Insane Clown Posse wear facepaint & drink Faygo - their name stems from ICP’s song ‘The Juggla.’ 
[eps #16 & #66]
2. They’re the antithesis of Cuddlahs – clown from the neck up. 
[eps #16, & #17 & #66]
3. The tension between Cuddlahs & Juggalos will escalate into a scenario not unlike the plot of Stephen King’s The Stand. 
[ep #25]  4. Now that they're on the FBI watch list...they're not too bad, bro - we're all about a miracle.  [ep #75]  

Karros Bobbleheads –

The Dodgers were dumping shit when they gave these away to the crowd, since the guy isn’t even on the team anymore. Next week’s bobblehead is the greenskeeper.  [ep #110]

Keep That Bit! –

A reality show where three comics, all of which claim to have written the same bit, perform it, and then America decides who owns it.  [ep #53]

Kevin –

1. Greg's crush.  [ep #91]
2. Amateur VJ.  [LC #2]

Keyboard –

Gilmartin asks if anyone’s ever gotten jizz on one and wants an honest answer.  [ep #101]

Kick it in a Queen –

Two men sleeping together in a bed, non-sexually. Greg wants to start doing this with Dave for Walking the Room the way Cotto and his gay friend do it when they’re training.  [ep #103]

Kicky –

The guy that kicks your tip with a steel-toe boot to give you a vag.  [ep #70]

Kilgariff, Karen –

She can't snitch, to this day [ep #49] because she worked as head writer for that Snitch.  Karen won 5 Emmys and is making a record - Dave & Greg are alone in a closet, and that's not gonna change.  [ep #38]

King Crimson –

Greg's worst trip involved him taking acid, the acid not working, and then having to pretend he liked this band.  [ep #99]

Kirby, Bruno –

The only comic book artist Greg knows, other than Steve Buscemi.  [DoSP]

Kitty Kat Kast –

An episode that is lost & dead cat-centric.  [ep #49]

Klanfield High –

Dave attended this school's costume contest dressed as his hero Eddie Murphy and an inadvertent racist.  [ep #97]

Knitting Needle –

The writing instrument used to autograph pumpkins.  [ep #67]

Kosehn –

The duo of Brian Posehn & Kyle Kinane, stars of the upcoming Bear remake of Brokeback Mountain.  [ep #58]

Krugman, Paul –

The guys hope to get this NYT op-ed columnist & Nobel prize winning economist in the closet to talk about Grip Em Ups.  [ep #64]

LA Podfest –

Tickets now on sale to this 3-day festival in Santa Monica on October 12 – 14 founded by Dave and featuring Walking the Room, Little Big Dollhouse Explanations & Doug Loves Hallways. Follow @LAPodfest[ep #106]

LaBeouf, Shia –

1. While the papaya is the douche of fruits, LeBeouf is the papaya of acting. 
[ep #60] 
2. He was heard screaming “I’m not a papaya” after getting beat up in Canada.  [ep #74]
3. Literal translation? “Shit the Beef.”  [ep #83]

Lady Pirate Dog –

She’s not in “incredible shape” if she walked with a peg leg.  [ep #113]

Lake Havasu –

A nightmare filled with STD’s. This lake contains poisonous detached vaginas & dick spew.  [ep #115]

Lake Moron –

You ‘take a dip in' this when you listen to WTR.  [ep #26]

Lamb to the Slaughter –

Dave blindly walked into the news of SuperPod's demise like this - a Disney character with big eyes, full of hope.  [DoSP]

Land Rover –

The automobile of choice for Hollywood Prodouchebags. LA drivers use these vehicles to take up two parking spots rather than pursue gazelles.  [ep #59]

LapouT –

The MMA move when you lick another man’s buttle until he taps out.  [ep #106]

Larynx –

What Dave used to have before getting high-sticked on the day Gilmartin took it off the ice and brought it into the closet.  [ep #73]

Late Night Goldfish Situation –

Dave finds these delicious fish made of orange swimming around his pantry irresistible, despite them turning him into a disastrous salt pie.  [ep #71]

Lay It Out, Brotha! –

Greg wants to confess, but he doesn't want to do this.  [ep #80]

Lays Moveables –

(or Legs)
A bag of chips filled with ants.  [ep #86]

Led Zeppelin –

Because Jonah Ray hates them, you wouldn’t play him an obscure track off of Coda.  [ep #104]

Let Me Grab Your Sack –

Walking the Room's newest slogan.  [ep #76]

Let Me Spit on Your Cock –

A new WTR slogan. You do it because lube's made out of oil & expensive – the terrorists win on that one.  [ep #80]

Lice Family –

Guests of Greg's talk show that were booted from being on-air and required the studio to be fumigated after Hair & Make-up discovered their lice infestation. They were booked as guests again a short time later by a different producer, and the process repeated.  [ep #77]

Lie Day –

When you force your children to play hooky from school under false pretenses, like “allergies” or “hostage situation”.  [ep #80]

Lift to Babytown –

You might need one after using Dave’s shirt as a cry tissue.  [ep #59]

LinkedIn –

Greg wants to stop getting email invites to join this site from friends he barely knows.  [ep #103]

Linus –

noun:
1. A jeggings-clad hipster known to grab compost, eat it & shit out bad ideas.  [ep #76]
proper noun:
1. His shutter has replaced his voice and captured the pulse of LA's nightlife and lobby toys.  [ep #81]
2. When Daddy's about to get angry, Linus throws his girlfriend Witch Nose under the bus.  [ep #81]
3. After Witch Nose dumped him, he tried to mend his broken heart by Eat, Pray, Loving It - he packed his Louis Vuitton bags and booked a trip to India through Wes Anderson with Jason Schwartzman. He’s been missing the Sunset Strip and tweeting Ghandi quotes ever since she got Bon Over him.  [ep #106]

Liquid Form –

The state of Greg’s daughters when they were in his body.  [ep #109]

Lists –

 Greg loves them because he loves a grouping of things in a particular order.  [ep #84]

Little Big Dog –

General Custer was ambushed here because there just weren’t enough dudes.  [ep #61]

Little Big Dollhouse Explanations –

1.  A fictional podcast that tours the different rooms of a dollhouse each week and explains how the shit is built.  [ep #39]
2.
  Big Moe, the distressed host, can’t figure out why the show averages 5 viewers.  [ep #39]
3.  A valuable pointer from the show is to “use soft wood, you don’t wanna use an oak.  You get walnut.”  [ep #39]
4.
  The idea of dissolving WTR to launch LBDE has been entertained.  [ep #39]
5.  A future series on ABC.  [ep #61]
6.  A little something special, coming soon...  [ep #75]  
7.  It's actually a sex show using dollhouses to explain anatomy.  [ep #91]
8.  The Walking the Room Podcast Network keeps getting Big Moe's hopes up, then passing on LBDE.  [ep #93]
9.  While recording a podcast in a boxcar, you might hear one hobo ask another, “Did you see Little Big Dollhouse Explanations last night? That shit was fucking awesome, dude.”  [ep #97]
10. Dane Cook went full LBDE in the movie written for him and Larry the Cable Guy on Netflix.  [ep #97]

Little Feller –

Greg’s title for Paul “wiseacre” Armstrong’s hamster version of Old Yeller. 
[ep #42]

Little Larry’s Gangbang –

Either a horrible Grimm Fairy Tale or a YouPorn.  [ep #113]

Little Suitcase Sitting in the Hallway –

The silent indicator that young Greg Behrendt would soon be dressed up like Tiny Mad Men & taken in for eye surgery.  [ep #49]

Little Trees –

Broccoli.  [ep #93]

LL Cool J –

Dave’s guy right now – and the methed-out burglar that woke up in the hospital is Walking the Room. Florida is Greg’s guy - always has been, always will be.  [ep #118]

LMFAO –

The “Party Rockin’ in the House Tonight” band that’s just a guy with no music.  [ep #109]

Load Water –

1. A victim of workplace water bottle cum-ingestion [ep #41] was awarded $27K in restitution, and Dave admits he'd drink this for $25K, but Greg won't commit for $500K.  [ep #89]
2. Greg doesn't think this topic is appropriate for what should have been a clean cuddle, but Dave can't help it if he talks about the news - Nightline did an identical segment.  [ep #89]

Lockup –

1. This MSNBC prison documentary series is Dave’s favorite TV show. 
[ep #9]
2.
Dave has considered committing a felony in hopes of getting incarcerated and appearing on this show.  [ep #41]
3. There's a Cuddlah on the inside [ep #38] and the showrunner delivered Dave swag.  [ep #41]

Loeb, Lisa –

A girl who plays guitar at a yard sale.  [LC #2]

London –

People send emergency emails when they lose all their money in this city, or while crying after joining this 80’s band with Slash.  [ep #103]

Long Distance Situation –

Glaser's done with this shit.  [ep #92]

Long John Tacos –

Series starring the guy that banged Stiffler's mom.   [ep #76]

Loud Lady –

Pistol Dick's downstairs neighbor in her 50’s with 2 dogs & a cat – no human would live with it because it’s terrifying.  [ep #118] 

Lube Town –

Dave's store of choice that goes for the up-sell; get their whole line to jerk off different on different days.  [LC #1]

Lynyrd Skynyrd –

They were formed the same way the LAPD were – by recruiting ex-military white racists from the south.  [ep #102]

M&M's –

Getting hit with a sack of them might not hurt too badly, sans the shell shards, but the lingering smell of chocolate would make for an uneasy memory. 
[ep #50]

Madea –

Tera Pyler’s Mama’s Family for black people.  [ep #63]

Magic –

1. The type of school Greg is going to send his daughters to.  [ep #103]
2. For one afternoon Dave had magical powers, then he couldn’t reverse them.  [ep #103] 
3. WTR probably has these listeners. Upset? Start a thread[ep #103]

Mainstream Anything –

Greg never wants to work in this ever again, which is probably for the best.  [ep #57]

Make a Fetish –

(or Find Your Fetish)
A website that determines your new fetish through random selections. 
Potential outcomes include: 
- Plaid Shirts, Earthworms & Culinary Skills 
- Fishhooks, Tiny Ponies & Tennis Shoes
- Puppies, Politics & Ice
- Lettuce, Lawnchairs & Bricks  [ep #96]

Male Sponsor –

The father figure Justin Hamilton is looking for, like George Clooney, or Jon Hamm.  [ep #99]

Mama's Family –

Rob Delaney sees starring in a 365 day Des Moines Community Theater production of this as something he would enjoy.  [ep #87]

Mammal Toe –

The clown suit that didn't quite fit Dave gave him this tight weird ball situation.  [LC #2]

Man Camp –

Where the bros go to make fire & fuck Gibbons. Fit men gather in the woods for a vision quest & JO circle. We’re talking blade-wielding men with knowledge of native vegetation & modern music armed with gloves, splash-resistant goggles & bedazzled Ed Hardy camping gear. BYOC! (Crystal, not cock rings). Nickelback provided. NOT GAY.  [ep #64]

Man Cave –

We’re not sure of Adam Carolla’s definition, but where Dave’s from, it’s an asshole.  [ep #30]

Man Clit –

Greg’s term for cock.  [ep #40]

Man Girl Cow –

1. Greg declares Karen the new co-host when she decides to check this combination of boxes on her custom on-line order.  [ep #49]
2. The star of "Girly Man Cow," the new show following "Little Big Dollhouse Explanations," rounding out WTR's prime-time 8-9 block.  [ep #51]

Man Lick –

To disarm your daughter's boyfriend, invite him over for football, then give him one of these from chin to hairline to see if he tastes like success.  [ep #90]

Man Party! –

1. Greg’s definitive statement about the film Con Air.  [ep #54]
2. Don’t roll up to one in your Girl Outfit (OP shorts & tennis shoes).  [ep #55]

Man-mellow –

What Dave’s made of on the inside.  [ep #101]

Manapouri Power Station –

Underground New Zealand location that’s not a gay bar or a band.  [ep #107]

Manbush –

1. Greg's new book describing scenarios in which women ambush men by setting them up to fail.  [DoSP] 
2. Dave's new book that has a completely different premise and is mostly pictures.  [DoSP]

Maniranha –

1. Maniranha, he’s a man and a piranha! He’s all normal except for his super small fang mouth – Don’t kiss him, ladies – but he’s cute! A Jon Hamm face with a dangerous little underbite. He’s a super villain whose origin stems from the really hard dating scene in Shanghai.  [ep #110]
2. The first recorded compliment Dave ever gave Greg was calling this the greatest song in the history of the show.  [ep #112]

Maron-Style Cat-Territory –

Greg generally doesn't like a pet story, so when a cat tale veers off in this direction, he checks out.   [ep #76]

Married –

No ceremony needed!  You’re automatically married if you came at the same time.  [ep #43]

MASH Note –

1. A note on Greg’s car written in blue crayon - presumably by a kid, mother, lunatic or Crayola employee – but is definitely a listener, as it essentially read, “I think you’re special, don’t ever let anybody tell you you’re not.”  [ep #115]   2. Dave’s never gotten a note because people know not to approach him in that manner.  [ep #115]   3. Greg gets notes because people love it - it wears a mohawk, it’s gorgeous, it’s fit and it’s the right age.  [ep #115]

Matchbox 20 –

1. A dangerous organization that, like Hamas, does good and bad.  Sure, they set up pre-schools, but the children only learn about Matchbox 20.  [ep #57]
2. You can't do a bit about them at a comedy club. First off, they love Matchbox 20. Second off, fuck you.  [ep #95] 3. They rank high on the “Music You’ve Heard in Other People’s Cars” charts.  [ep #117]

Maybe We Can Talk About Some Stuff –

The premise for WTR.  [ep #105]

Mayonnaise Snowball –

When you put mayo in your mouth & spit it into your partner's.  [ep #92]

Me, Bernie and the Mannequin –

Andrew McCarthy only pitches TV shows like this - about him and inanimate objects.  [ep #116]

Meat Pigs –

1. When asked to "Put a Bag on" these, you're being instructed to hide your feet, perhaps with black velvet slippers.  [ep #76]
2. If someone brings their wet meat pigs to the party, you'll smell it on the plane.  [ep #94]

Medically Connected –

Rob Delaney and his wife are linked in a way that, if she died, he would also a few days later, after each of his semi-voluntary functions fully ceased.  [ep #87]

Meet the Fuck-Ups –

The reaction of the army of dissatisfied Ben Stiller fans who tuned in because he tweeted about the podcast.  [ep #84]

Meetings –

Sexual encounters.  [ep #86]

MegaPod –

The next joint live show will kick it up a notch – just TRY to lose this podcast! If you miss this one, you'd better be dead or in jail – and if you're in jail? BREAK OUT.  [DoSP]

Melting Before the Power of Hamm –

When you leave the house thinking you look decent, but then you catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror, talking to Jon Hamm, and you have to watch yourself not be handsome.  [ep #99]

Men Without Hats –

(or a-ha)
Greg's agent told him a publisher had essentially described him as this.  [ep #93]

Merkin –

Male rug reminiscent of a 1983 lady bush.  [ep #77]

Meth Recipe –

Simmer Advil, fruit punch, white coke and lemons for 4 hours.  [ep #83]

Mid Flush –

No one would blame a woman for choosing this moment to climb out of the toilet.  [ep #56]

Mid-Western Blowhard –

Jimmy Pardo.  [ep #65]

Middle-Aged Guys of Comedy –

A new spin on Comedians of Comedy - this time in golf clothes - with shows scheduled once every seven months.  [ep #54]

Mike Patton Poop –

Shits are unpredictable, and so is Axel Rose – that’s why the Faith No More lead singer chose to leave this on his equipment instead.  [ep #117]

Mime Attack –

When Dave attended Mime School in 5th grade, his mime peers, fed up with his talkie antics, spit water on him and then chased him, swinging.  [ep #44]

Mind Leash –

If you have a mind connection with your dog, you’ll never lose it.  Crickets implements it, and it's available at Pet Stop, on Craigslist or Dave can hook you up with a premium one for $500.  [ep #58]

Miracle Shits –

They never get hard or deteriorate; they’re always 100% fresh.  [ep #113]

Miracles –

1. This Christian-themed ICP song attributes scientifically explainable occurrences in nature to miracles, posing questions like, “Fucking magnets – how do they work?”  [ep #17 & #20]
2. Greg can’t understand why a former listener/Juggalo would want to kick their ass rather than marvel at the miracle of podcasting.  [ep #73]

Mitch –

1. An original Dave neighbor – a 46 year old stoner veteran.  [ep #4]
2. He’s always up for a little B&B - Bongs & Babies.  [ep #4]
3. He couldn’t do a break-in [ep #4] because he doesn’t have the crime gene, he’s just stupid.  [ep #5]
4. He once punched a woman in the street, explaining, “I’m off my meds!” 
[ep #5]
5. Dave’s wife’s inability to comfortably end a conversation resulted in her offering up a spare set of keys to Mitch.  [ep #5]
6. Dave was enraged that while he was on the road, Mitch taught his son how to hi-five.  [ep #10]
7. When Mitch walked off into the sunset to clean up the oil spill [ep #12], the guys feared they'd soon run out of content, but all subsequent neighbors have been even crazier than Mitch [ep #24], so Greg doesn't miss him or his short pants at all.  [ep #25]
8. Greg points out that while Dave is occupied recording the Cuddle, his wife has that window of time to safely make a run for it, and Mitch could return to help move her out.  [ep #17] 9. We all miss Mitch.  [ep #120]

Monster Twat –

1. Nickname of the first girlfriend that broke Greg's heart.  [ep #97]
2. MT is a children's book, like Hunger Games, that Dave is writing.  [ep #97]

Mored –

When something is extended – ie, if they extend the run of a play, they mored it.  [ep #94]

Morrison, Jim –

It’s out of the bag; Dave has his asshole, and it’s slightly too small.  [ep #50]

Mouse PTSD –

The disorder David O'Doherty struggles with daily as a result of growing up in a Lewis Caroll story.  [ep #98]

Mouth Expanders –

The device girls use to build character.  [ep #120]

Movies –

You can't run out of them, because they don’t stop. They come out every week.  [ep #116]

Mr. Rabbits –

Dave pitched ABC this show in which the titular character (Luis Guzmán) fucks rabbits and puts eggs in his ass.  They passed.  [ep #66]

Muffins –

Brits eat the shit outta them.  [ep #53]

Mumblety Peggy –

The character Greg portrays when he puts on a little girl costume, gathers the kids around and breaks out the knives.  [ep #109]

Murder Chickens –

Although Hawaii has managed to keep them at bay, don’t tempt fate by going hunting for eggs at night.  [ep #68]

Music –

A woman sharing an elevator with Dave stated she likes it after noticing his Discman.  [ep #107]

Musk Flavored Sticks –

Disgusting pink Twizzler-esque candies from Australia that smell like Marc Maron & Janeane Garofalo circa ’94:  A hippie dick nightmare.  [ep #37]

Muslim Tech –

Greg went to pre-school there with Barack Obama.  [ep #79]

Mustaches & Beards –

Modern-day Brooklyn.  [ep #94]

Mustaine, Dave –

The Megadeath leader who’s still mad about being kicked out of Metallica and thinks Obama orchestrates tragic shootings. We’d love to put him in the same room as a book.  [ep #118]

My Little Corndogs –

New WTR stuffed sex toys that encourage you to “Put yours in a corndog!”  [ep #106]

N'SYNC –

Keyser Soze doesn't want his Young Gentlemen Boat Situation to do this.  [ep #82]

Naked Guy –

A rivalry between two naked guys that were not in cahoots began with both men insisting they were THEE naked guy, triggering one to eat the other’s face, stopping only after being shot to death.  [ep #105]

NAPA Truck –

When Dave drove this auto parts truck, he got that crazy NAPA tool-driving pussy.  [ep #89]

NASCUNT –

Dave.  [ep #119]

Nash, Jason –

This comedian knew Sweater rocks a man bag, so he hesitated to assume the rainbow hair clip Greg had on in public was just a forgotten prank on his daughter.  [ep #84]

Neidermeyer House –

In college, Greg unknowingly joined this fraternity thinking he was signing up for Delta House.  [ep #30]

Nell Carter’s Asshole –

There’s a higher demand to see this than to see Greg in briefs.  [ep #30]

Neo-Twee Hippies –

A type of person that, while adorable, makes you wonder, “Where are their cocks?”  The genre includes, but is not limited to: Demetri Martin, Juno, Jason Schwartzman & Arcade Fire.  [ep #45]

Never Not Nope –

WTR is packaged in a shoebox full of cum, potato chips & toenails.  [ep #119]

No Indian Jokes –

The warning a Morongo Casino employee gave Greg before his performance, forcing him to edit out the bits from his insensitive Indian show.  [ep #93]

No Man Festival –

1. Greg wants to launch and podcast live from this festival after organizing a No-Hundred to ensure no one shows up.  [ep #89]
2. Nancy Grace sometimes broadcasts from there.  [ep #89]

No Soul Network –

(or The White Channel)
It only plays things horrible & demeaning to other human beings. No black artists.  [ep #71]

No-Brow –

(or Bro-Brow)
The genre WTR has invented by mining for gold in a pine cone.  [ep #61]

Nobody Talks About Food Anymore! –

Scream it to stop the cycle of eating in circles.  [ep #93]

Non-Hateful Alpha Male Element –

Gilmartin is impressed by Dave & Greg’s ability to achieve this throughout the testosterone-filled Bro Fest.  [ep #73]

Nonana –

When an old banana becomes so gnarly & brown, it gets mistaken for a mystery shit.  [ep #47]

Nope –

The Official WTR & Reigning Monarchs' Clothing Brand[ep #118]

Not Where Daddy Lives –

The concept of acting somewhat respectable on a personal Facebook page.  [ep #65]

Nutella –

When you enter the mind of a mouse, you'll conclude this product is like peanut butter, but more delicious. The spread makes the perfect death trap for Ringo, the legendary explorer mouse from O'Doherty's childhood.  [ep #98]

NYPD Blue –

The FCC hit them with a big fine when they aired a cunt. …David Caruso. BOOM!  [ep #116]

Oakland –

The German word for Portland.  [ep #109]

Occupy Bloomington –

Greg swears this protest consisted of 4 guys with a chalkboard of activities like “Get up at 6” - Dave thinks he may have just witnessed a game night.  [LC #1]

Occupy Living Room –

Greg follows this Twitter account to keep up-to-date on the mother-in-law situation in Dave's house.  [ep #90]

Octopus –

If a woman’s vagina doesn't feel like this, it’s not ready.  [ep #105]

Odd Couple –

Jimmy Pardo likens Greg & Dave to this duo, only Randall & Matthau - TV Felix & Movie Oscar.  [ep #65]

OGD –

Original Granny Dump is a description of the podcuddle, but Cuddlahs are also Old School OGD.  [ep #52]

Oil Drums of Grey Chicken –

1. The barrels in the back of The Colonel.  [ep #78]
2. Something you make love to that's odor is Walking the Room.  [ep #78]
3. Greg's Oprah years.  [ep #78]
4. On the TV version of WTR, Greg & Dave will pull show topics out of them, like “cancer,” or “skulls”.  [ep #78]

Old & Older –

Greg’s tough new mafia-style manager booked him this show on Comedy Central with co-star Bob Newhart.  [ep #68]

Old Blues –

Pre-internet, back when Blues was on CD, featuring classic artists like Eric Clapton, Stevie Ray Vaughan and Jack White.  [ep #90]

Old Guy Rock Stories –

A show for guys with beards that could stand to lose 20 pounds, covering topics like Shellac & Built to Spill.  [LC #1]

Old MacDonald –

Dave wants to sing his way out of fisticuffs with this song or Wheels on the Bus. Greg opts to improvise his way out of the fight, with lyrics like, “Cut it out – you’re hurting my feelings…don’t do it, it’ll just turn out bad…”  [ep #70]

Old Man Yells at Cloud –

Classic Simpsons headline and Dave's Indian name.  [DoSP]

Omaha, Larry –

1. The tall, handsome Native American comedian that the FBI suspected of stealing children. They mistook him for Des Moines, Tonto or something else unfunny.  [ep #74]
2. Shortly after his debut mention on the cuddle, Omaha resurfaced in an article on Thanksgiving comedy mentioning him AND Greg!  [ep #79]
3. When you get a vagina, you also get a valet, and Dave's is Omaha.  [ep #82]

One Punch –

The total amount of punches it will take if you threaten to punch Dave until he cums.  [ep #102]

Open Mic –

Greg is in this stage of shirt making.  [ep #115]

Oprah's Pussy –

Dave lost 50 followers in 3 minutes after tweeting that this “tastes like ratings”.  [ep #76]

Opulence –

If a 15 year old ever uses this word, particularly to profess his love for it, you should be allowed to remove his head with your bare hands or hit him with a shovel.  [ep #110]

Oranges –

1. This fruit grows on Dave’s neighbors’ tree, and turned the Hobo Family into Hobotang after they were forced to climb said tree daily to steal oranges for sustenance.  [eps #22, #24 & #66]
2. There’s oranges for picking, there’s oranges for me, but Hobo Orangutans think that they get their oranges for free, and they don’t.  Listen.  [ep #39]
3. Kinane agrees that taking material possessions is theft, but he’s on the fence about free-hanging fruit. Though he notes that climbing a tree is “a bit much.”  [ep #69]  4. In California, the tree is always buoyant, because the state keep making fruit.  [ep #120]

Ottoman –

Much like Cameron Diaz is paid to attend parties, you can pay Danny DeVito to act as this footstool.  Or just hire him to sit in your garage and scare unsuspecting houseguests.  [ep #59]

Out & Around the Curtain –

Greg wants SF NYC to open with this move - Dave poking both his head & the head of his cock around the corner simultaneously.  [ep #85]

Outie –

As a lesbian, Greg's crush isn't interested in his brand of person – she's looking for an innie.  [ep #91]

P90 Sandwich –

(or Sammies)  [ep #18]
WTR’s P90X alternative that’s easier to stick with.  [ep #23]

P90X –

1. Go from fat to prison fit.  [ep #17]
2. Should be called what it is – a Vengeance Workout.  [ep #18] 
3. Alternate P90X titles include: 
‘You Shoulda Called Me Back’
‘Hey, What Are You Looking At?’
‘Nobody Says No To Me’
and Hollywood’s ‘You Shoulda Fucking Read My Script.’  [ep #18]
4. It scares Dave [ep #16], and Greg participated, but eventually bailed.  [ep #29]
5. P90X couples' babies are born with pubes.  [ep #34]
6. 3 year olds should only have their shirts off if they’re trying to get a tan or if they’re doing P90Baby (or PBaby).  [ep #108]

Pa Kettle –

Ron Paul's doppelganger.  [ep #85]

Pain Threshold –

The podcast Dave will start with Paul Gilmartin after Greg dies.  [ep #88]

Palm Trees –

1. Greg gets intoxicated by them; they give him hope.  [ep #56]
2. Throw in a cloud and you’ve got yourself an afternoon!  [ep #56]

Pandas –

1. Dave loves the idea of dying animals to look like other animals, particularly Cuddle Pandas - dogs made to look like pandas.  [ep #60]
2. According to David O'Doherty's book 100 Facts About Pandas, if a panda is struck by lightening, their black hair turns white, their white hair turns black and they're called Negative Pandas. However, if they're struck TWICE, the colors go back to their original state, and they're called Double-Negative Pandas, or Pandas.  [ep #98]

Panic Math –

The crazy, frazzled explanation you blurt out when caught trying to steal money.  [ep #58]

Panic Mode –

Dave's mother in-law goes straight to this whether there's a missing ATM card, a UTD in progress, or when night falls and the creek is dry.  [ep #91]

Panic Pee –

When the thought of not being able to pee later makes you have to pee immediately.  [ep #94]

Pantcentas –

Greg's gray shorts are these placenta-made pants.  [ep #87]

Party Rock Bus –

For $500 per ticket, you can ride this bus from Austin to Oklahoma City with Greg & Dave while they’re in clown outfits & hats with the bills up. Includes free tickets to their shows – or you can JUST ride the bus. This WTR experience boasts bare-knuckle fist-fights, a woman that’s half-homeless/half-prostitute, and a murder.  [ep #109]

Party Trick –

When in doubt, a porn star's default is to open their legs and start masturbating.  [ep #91]

Peas & Corn –

You eat them warm, and if a man is unhappy with his sister(-in-law?)’s dinner starting with these, Greg got his back - even if he gets hit with a chair.  [ep #120]

Penis Lesson –

1. In mechanic school, you put your trannies* down (*by that, we mean transmissions) and learn about how you can’t get hard-ons again once you pop the little balloons inside your dick that cause an erection.  [ep #118]   2. WTR’s new name.  [ep #118]

People –

What Patton's made of, much to the disappointment of an LA amateur comedian & blogger.  [ep #85]

Perceived Slights –

What Greg gets mad about. Straw dogs & ghosts.  [ep #99]

Percy –

The name of all the cows on Wil's father's dairy farm.  [ep #83]

Peruvian Clowns –

They look a little Harajuku – like something Gwen Stefani would buy to follow her around.  [ep #113]

Pete Best of Comedy –

What Dana Gould thinks he is, and who Albert Brooks relates to.  [ep #95]

Peyote Bro –

Greg is shredding and bringin' it – he's like a peyote button – you'll ask, 'why am I doing this?' but then you go on that ride, and he'll take you to a hotel & beat the fuck outta you.  [ep #87]

Pig Room –

Newly developed homes have trouble selling when designed with this unorthodox front room.   [ep #75]

Pig Skins –

Greg thinks him & Dave should take theirs out, oil up & bro down for the Superbowl - they'll get a couple footballs and have a game of touch.  [ep #89]

Pill Bug Circus –

When it’s lights out in your hotel room, watch where you step!  This traveling circus of pill bugs often gets double-booked.  And if they're not keeping their ringleader in a special pill bug box, you don't want to be responsible for crushing their Trapeze guy.  [ep #47]

Pillow Pet –

1. Dave suggests they make a vagina model.  [ep #43]
2. The adult version is the Pillow Pussy, for when you want to do "the nod" (just lay against it and go in for a sleep).  [ep #51]
3. Greg offers to be Dave’s, and whisper “hi, Boo Bear” as a way to comfort him.  [ep #117]

Pills, Booze or Boredom –

Reasons someone might fall asleep at a Live Cuddle.  [LC #2]

Pin Marks & a Smell –

Tell-tale signs you’re dealing with semen-laced yogurt or Courtney Love.  [ep #74]

Pink Face Guys –

A bro that’s a working gentleman.  [ep #108]

Piranha –

1. Brian Posehn’s late-80’s stand-up alter-ego.  [ep #4 & #44]
2. The dangerous fish you cut open to locate your infant’s missing fingertip when your parental instincts kick in.  [ep #109]

Piss Jar –

(or PJ)
1. Cuddlah Code dictates you always have a hot jar in your car, full and at the ready, to use as a situation closer - a man with a piss jar is a man with a plan.  [ep #52]
2. People know Greg has a plan the moment he enters holding a mason jar filled with urine.  [ep #67]

Piss Pies –

Spring is right around the corner, so start gathering urine lemons - spring time is piss time for piss pies.  [ep #88]

Piss Soak Your Lemons –

A guy with a piss-soaked lemon is also a man with a plan. When hobotangs on steroids jack citrus from your tree, inject each lemon with your own urine, then sit back and wait for them to put it in their cocktails, or “dranks”. You'll have to go full store bought this season, but it's legal revenge - you can put piss in your own lemons.  [ep #87]

Pistol Dick –

(or Loud Dude, but pistol trumps loud)   1. The 35 year old husky neighbor that lives upstairs from loud lady, only his “loud” involves blasting his music - he likes Hot Hits like Aerosmith & Baby Got Back.  [ep #118]  2. He was arrested for bringing 3 gentlemen out of Frenchy Happy Cheese Time and into Crazy Wild West via pistol for not understanding at 6pm on a Sunday his baby still got back.  [ep #118]  3. His pitbull Casey pees on Dave’s tomatoes.  [ep #118]   4. Pistol Dick is on my side. Cuddlahs thought Dave let the incident go to easy  [ep #120]

Pity Rape –

Cuddlah Katie Baker defines this as pity fucking yourself with pie ala mode when you’re lactose intolerant.  This line of thought makes Greg wonder what we stand for as people.  [ep #27]

Placenta –

Rob Delaney feels that if you must consume it, at least eat it in the delivery room like a goddamn mammal.  [ep #87]

Plecostomus –

Commonly found in aquariums, they are often referred to as sucker fish or algae eaters, but never p’customers or percustomers.  [ep #49]

Plugtown –

Where McConaughey went after A Time to Kill.  [ep #77]

Pobody's Nerfect –

1. What the bust of Jesus on the nightstand should've turned and said after Dana Gould impaled his arm on its crown of thorns.  [ep #95]
2. Had Charles Manson said this upon arrest, they would've had to let him go.  [ep #95]

Pod Rats –

If the Rat Pack were starting today, they’d have a podcast and wouldn’t even be that popular.  [ep #119]

Podcuddle –

(aka Cuddle or Hot Cup O’Cuddle [ep #46], Shitty & Sad [ep #54] ) 
1. WTR’s term for the podcast.  [ep #6]
2. The listeners are involved in the podcuddle [ep #8] – the embrace is Dave holding Greg because he’s scared, and Greg holding the listeners because he cares.  [ep #15]
3. When two bros get together and they talk/don’t talk about the weather, it’s a cuddle. Grab all your kitties, grab some pups, let’s get together, talk about grip em ups.  [ep #61]
4. Jonah describes it as a back of the room conversation.  [ep #62]
5. One gigantic HR violation barely safe for use in the home.  [ep #68]
6. Standing in shit, but looking up. That’s optimism. And that’s Walking the Room.  [ep #69]
7. These are first-time stories that will never be repeated for obvious reasons, and they’re never gonna get better.  [ep #72]

Poddy –

Greg won this award for Best One-Liner Pun on a podcast.  (see: N'SYNC)  [ep #82]

Poet Blouse –

Greg was rocking awful sunglasses and this on his football player physique as he ran across a field to introduce himself to Karen.  [ep #49]

Point Break –

The film that launched its own sect of Buddhism involving the Red Hot Chili Peppers & Nixon Masks.  [ep #114]

Pompahawk –

The original WTR auto-tune theme song creator.
[ep #2 thru #17, occasional bonus endings]

Pop-Con –

It’s just like Comic-Con, but in LA, and nobody goes to it. So, it’s really like the World’s Worst Open Mic.  [ep #112]

Porn Nest –

When Dave discovers porn in someone’s home, he shreds 'em and creates this nest to jerk off in.  [ep #61]

Potarded –

The amount of potatoes that constitutes an astounding giant pile served for breakfast.  [ep #85]

Poundstone, Paula –

Dave likens her to a tree stump  - he doesn’t find anything sexual about her, and is pretty sure she doesn’t find anything sexual about herself. He's attracted to a feminine essence, but Greg likes a brave woman with a bow & arrow.  [ep #106]

Power Move –

(or Signature Brand Dump)
1. Everybody's gotta have a move, and for Russell Brand, leaving a pre-show sober, solid clean-thru for other comics to find is his thang. Though Dave, Dana Gould and Jen Kirkman have all stumbled upon his celebrity shit, the move isn't serial – it's signature.  [ep #88]
2. Bea Arthur did the same move on the set of The Golden Girls, only she called the BAPD a 'growler'.  [ep #88]
3. Greg feels like a better move would be to shit directly on a desk, not hide it like an Easter egg and wait for it to be found.  [ep #88]
4. The move to use when you're at Rainbow Crew hangin' with Taboo and gotta poo.  [ep #90] 
5. Joan of Arc used to shit her armor.  [ep #90]
6. David O'Doherty is sympathetic to Russell Brand's PM and thinks it's an environmental thing.  [ep #98]

Prank-Based Economy –

It's the financial solution no one's talking about on the stump – a new system where Steve-O & Tom Green run for office and Joe Rogan & Johnny Knoxville are our best bets.  [ep #89]

Pretty Animals –

What they eat in South Africa.  [ep #68]

Pretty Little Girl –

Most of what Dave says is like this, if you analyze it.  [ep #100]

Prince –

Greg's current title as next in line to be King of the Dog Shows.  [ep #89]

Prison –

1. It's more than just a recurring theme of the show –
it's a constant undertone.  [ep #31]
2. There's no prison section in Barnes & Noble.  [ep #39]

Probotang –

Hobotang that circle around until a garage sale ends to haul-off the unsold.  [LC #2]

Professional Amateur Fighters –

The guys that get into enough street-altercations to know to take off their shirts and hand off their keys & cell phones.  [ep #112]

Promoting Homosexuality –

1. Rather than be accused of “promoting” homosexuality by merely acknowledging it exists, the gay community should consider launching a two month ad campaign in an attempt to actively recruit. Commercials could depict scenarios highlighting some of the many perks the lifestyle has to offer, and utilize catchy slogans like, “Gay: It’s What’s for Dinner.”  [ep #63]
2. Dave reminds the audience that aggressive promotion is what we're looking for, and Greg's disappointed he hasn't seen a flag, an ad or anything.  [ep #86]
3. Dave Holmes feels Neil Patrick Harris is their best ambassador.  [LC #2]
4. Let’s get open about our bodies, and our fingers.  [ep #100]
5. FYI, studies show 75% of people who save babies from trains are homosexual.  [ep #107]

Puffy V –

If you’re drowning, puff up your vagina to use it as a floatation device, then breathe through it.  [ep #115]

Pumpkin Pie –

It's not meant to be hip – go Libby's and don't fuck with it.  [ep #78]

PunchCum.com –

Sponsor of WTR Live.  [ep #105]

Punchline Approaching –

The phone in Greg's closet acts as a warning bell alerting you to this.  [ep #95]

Punctuate –

There’s no need to do it when people love you.  [ep #57]

Pussy Like a Racehorse –

What a lot of people don't know Rob Delaney has, but Dave discovered during their threesome with Greg.  [ep #93]

Putter Done –

The most sought after of all Crickets’ vaginas, #19, is actually tight enough to require a pitching wedge.  [ep #50]

Pyramid People –

The aliens that invaded LA unnoticed during the TomKat split – they can’t fit at desks, and have to sit on the floor.  [ep #110]

Quaid –

proper noun:
1. When Dave had a moustache, Wil Anderson likened him to a cleaned-up Randy.  [ep #33]
adjective:
2. When a person becomes paranoid, delusional and convinced they’re involved in a conspiracy, they’ve gone ‘full’ or ‘total’ Quaid.  [ep #30]

Queerwolf –

The Walking the Room Broadcasting Network, brought to you by Axe & Lint Balls.  [ep #85]

Rabie –

A raw baby with no vaccinations or reversed inoculations.  [ep #64]

Racist Radio –

The station that features Joe Quesadilla.  [DoSP]

Rain Man Situation –

Dave's explanation of why Greg is able to remember lengthy Shakespearean monologues but can't complete a simple thought.  [ep #90]

Rainbow Crew –

Group led by Black Eyed Peas' Taboo that played Haiti and last year's Superbowl.  [ep #90]

Ram –

Ben Stiller greets you with a head-butt because this is his spirit animal; Dave’s is fear (formerly a clam).  [ep #64]

Rancid –

Posehn asked Greg how this band was going in reference to his hair, just moments before comparing Dave’s fro to Gabe Kaplan.  [ep #101]

Random Nude Dudes –

1. A party game of mystery! Players choose a card from the deck full of dicks and have to put together their story.  [ep #91]
2. Title of Dave's album.  [ep #91]

Rape & Feces –

Australian customers relying on the cuddle to learn about the culture of the states think this is what Americans are all about.  [ep #54]

Rape the Land –

The Ted Nugent event where attendees cut holes in the dirt and fuck it, sans perme. That dirt is AMERICA.  [ep #110]

Rape Your Stash –

Fan expression indicating they'd like to purchase merchandise.  [ep #75]

Ray Liotta Mouth –

Greg finds this facial feature on Hef’s Girl Next Door Kendra glaringly obvious ever since Doug Benson pointed it out.  [ep #25]

Record –

1. The crucial button occasionally not pushed prior to the start of the show. 
[eps #12, #22, #30, #33 & #87]
2. Matt Besser's episode was lost completely – it's audio failure right outta the gate, and while the sound quality has gotten better, the content's gotten worse.  [ep #88]
3. Nikki Glaser's original 2 segments were lost when the program crashed.  [ep #92]
4. Dave thought he lost the recording that changed the course of podcast history on Earth when he went to buy a hat. He lost the keys to Australia – deal with it.  [ep #98]

Red Hill –

The hill near KFC whose soil is red from the blood of slaughtered Indians (from India, not Native Americans).  [ep #78]

Red Man –

San Francisco's dry character-about-town that painted himself red and handed out his Xeroxed hand-written newsletters.  [ep #85]

Red Menace –

1. Dave's dad.  [ep #76]
2. Dave wants to rabbit punch his father in the cock.  [ep #84]
3. Dave portrays him by putting on a red wig and staring at his son until he cries.  [ep #109]
4. The nicest thing he ever did for Dave was leaving behind a stack of Playboys in the basement after the divorce.  [ep #112] 5. Greg wants him to have dinner with Bill Nye the Science Guy.  [ep #119]  6. He sent Dave a heartfelt birthday card and a $60 gift certificate to Men’s Warehouse.  [ep #120] 7. He’s a great drunk driver, and would’ve never gotten a DUI if that cab driver hadn’t kicked his door. This incident is the Season 1 Finale of the reality show Red & Skin Mountain[ep #120]

Red Vines –

1. Greg follows them and other candies on Twitter, which infuriates Dave, who demands to know what candy has to say.  [ep #111]  
2. Dave enjoys them & Twizzlers, both for their independent features.  [ep #111]

Release the Flies –

Ron Paul’s campaign promise.  [ep #74]

Relieved Him of His Voice Box –

A result of Greg’s Roadhouse lifestyle as an undersized bouncer.  [ep #114]

Reno Talk –

The WTRN show discussing how the big room at Harrah’s Reno is the only place Dave will perform stand-up. The only hiccup is he hasn’t been invited yet.  [ep #107]

Repetitive Storyteller –

The worst consequence of Nikki Glaser's blackout drinking was turning into this.  [ep #92]

Retards in a Box –

(see: Insane Clown Posse[ep #38]

Reverse Hobotang –

The busybody douche-about-town who values rules and the beautification of the neighborhood over compassion and human decency.  [ep #49]

Reverse Mustache –

When Max, the handlebar-moustache-clad co-founder of Forts & the In-Between, explained the concept to his father, his Dad reacted with, “Son, have you heard of a reverse moustache?  That’s actually when I take my straight-razor and I cut that thing off your face and shove it up your asshole.  Now take your Goddamn fort fantasy and get the fuck out of my house.” 
[ep #45]

Rhames, Ving –

He beats out Greg for the title of Cleanest Asshole in Hollywood – he waxes and bleaches – he's a totally black man with a tiny white asshole. ALLEGEDLY.  [LC #2]

Richard Simmon’s Balls –

To the listener: Don't send pictures of anything from segment 3 of this episode...except these.  [ep #118]

Ride the Horn –

Dave’s all-tranny band. They're great for when you want to look at the pink, brocious.  [ep #62]

Ridonkulous –

Don’t ever say that word.  [ep #106]

RIE Parenting –

Non-parenting style that questions the child's emotions and raises kids that grow up to run studios. It's nothing like Dave's parenting style involving discipline through self-mutilation.  [ep #79]

Rock Line –

Host Dr. Wil helps Dave cope with Greg’s grope.  [ep #58]

Roth, David Lee –

1. Greg and this former Van Halen frontman are kinda the same dude, and often appear wearing the same outfit, but in different cities.  [LC #2]
2. Greg'll de-dil-ee-bop DLR scat his way right out of a colonic story if Dick Behrendt's in the crowd.  [LC #2]

Rumble in your Buttle –

The UFC show on The WTR Podcast Network.  [ep #106]

Rumple Pork –

After an obese man spends 18 years in a vinyl chair, this is the abscessed meat that developed from the lost pork chop that embedded itself into his skin. 
[ep #63]

Rush –

Greg understands stoned customers, equating WTR to this band since it’s difficult and takes too long.  [ep #52]

Ryan, Nolan –

Dave auditioned for the role of Gary Oldman in Nolan Ryan’s Batman. 
[ep #61]

Sack in Pants, Mr. Anthony –

Dave’s loud demand to remind his son we’re putting our ball sack and our stem back in our pants for the holidays.  [ep #108]

Sad Lapse –

When you get drunk on gin & guava juice at the beach, then come to crying in your ex-girlfriend's mother's arms. [ep #97]

Sad Nips –

Dave has the world's saddest nipples, and fears he's passed the gene on to his son.  [ep #26]

Sad Rags –

(or Walking the Room Shop Rags)
After Brian McKnight shows you how it works, we’ll clean it up! The perfect item to wipe up after a live show.  [ep #110]

Sadder Than Us –

An ashen Susan from the Melbourne Comedy Festival played this card when she broke the bad news to Greg.  [DoSP]

Sadness: The Gathering –

A podcuddle-themed Magic-esque collectible card game with an ever-expanding deck created by Dillon St. Jean with contributor Patton Oswalt.  The object is to acquire 1,000 Hate Points in hopes to ultimately achieve “The Sweet Release of Suicide.”  [FB]

SAG-Anon –

Screen Actors Guild meetings for family members of alcoholics that Dave's friend attended solely to pick up chicks.  [ep #77]

Salmon –

Sometimes coated with cum & penko bread crumb.  [ep #56]

Sandusky –

1. Oprah bought an original Brian watercolor during her show taping because she's busy.  [ep #80]
2. Remember: When you can’t come to a consensus, everyone loves molestation humor, and it’s a great way to put OWN on the map.  [ep #100]
3. Greg turned the disaster into a plus for him.  [ep #100]

Sankyu –

The video store run by an Asian guy.  [ep #110]

Sans Beret –

When French neighbors go from miming at a cheese & grape party to running from pistols like typical Frenchies.  [ep #118]

Sans Permission –

(or Sans Permé)
1. The way you get your eyeballs licked clean when they’re not dirty.  [ep #104]  
2. Rape.  [ep #104]
3. The whole town goes this during a riot.  [ep #104]
4. The best way to fuck Charlie Clausen.  [ep #104]
5. Meals Sans Permé  refers to eating people.  [ep #106]

Scientology Lane –

The Battlefield Earth premiere was held on this street. Great boots, horrible movie.  [LC #2]

Scorpions –

(or THE Scorpions?)
There’s a rule: If you’re in this band, keep your shirt on. However, while performing live, the most out-of-shape Scorpion will repeatedly switch between taking his shirt off & putting multiple shirts back on. And you never see him put the shirts on; they just grow out of him.  [ep #109]

Scotland –

Everybody there has been stabbed at least twice.  [ep #79]

Screaming Bottle of Whiskey –

Dave's dad.  [ep #84]

Seafaring Hemingway Look –

The tell-tale sign when your substance of choice is mostly booze.  [ep #96]

Second Segment –

WTR no longer does this after receiving a complaint about their free content. The new segment format is now first, third, fourth.  [ep #109]

Sequoia, Rachel –

1. The barefoot neo-twee hippie that pitched her 'Share the Air' concept to a group of Silicon Valley venture capitalists.  [ep #45]
2. The pitch was later revealed to be a prank.  [ep #46]

Serious Solutions for a Serious Time –

NPR-style adult conversation podcast where hosts talk responsibly about being an adult and the things they do. They don't love it.  [ep #86]

Serious, Yahoo –

Wil finally googled him to have info at the ready for when Americans inevitably bring him up in conversation.  [ep #58]

Sex Pranks –

(or Sex Punk’d)
A hidden-camera prank show on ABC after Cougar Town.  The pilot involves unsuspecting women caught on tape when the actor they believe to be their "hot lover" turns oral sex into a series of hilarious mishaps!  [ep #51]

Sha Na No –

Dave is sometimes like Sha Na Na, but most times like this.  [ep #105]

Shakey & Assby –

A Michael Cera / Jesse Eisenberg cop drama.  [ep #21]

Shaking Your Coin Pockets –

A term for sex in the hobotang universe.  [ep #50]

Shank –

noun:
1. Dave believes Greg’s feet could be used as this weapon and could realistically cut tires.  [ep #39]
2. Bring this weapon to children's parties, so when a child grabs a garbage bag in lieu of a party favor bag to fill with treats, you can use it on their parents.  [ep #45]
3. Greg believes he can create an effective eye shank with candy canes sucked to a point.  [ep #45]
verb:
4. On Halloween, beware of trick-or-treaters willing to shank you for your stash of full-size Butterfingers.  [ep #21]
5. A common threat on the cuddle.
proper noun:
6. Shank denied his crimes to a local newspaper BEFORE being charged.  He’s currently in prison.  [ep #30]
(see also: Prison)

Shepherd –

Dave’s profession prior to the podcast. He led goats through Los Angeles until he took bath salts and ate them all – a moment Greg wants captured as a painting.  [ep #106]

Shirtless Coach –

Dave’s one-glove boxing, male model neighbor that can’t understand why the high school girls drool over him.  [ep #101]

Shirtless Reactions –

Women's responses to seeing the guys without clothes on have ranged from Greg getting, “You look like you used to work out,” to Dave’s even more startled, “I didn’t expect that.”  [ep #64]

Shit Fuck Teeth Man –

The artist formerly know as Jordan Paris and previously judged by Child Star, Almost Rape & Boy Zone.  [ep #58]  (see also: Cover Clowns)

Shit In –

The initiation baboons must go through to join a clan.  [LC #2]

Shit Sprinkler & Anvil Ass –

Dave & Greg's tactical personas at-the-ready for next Black Friday. After a year of grip em ups training, Greg will sport an anvil from his buttle like a tail, while Dave swings a bag of diarrhea.  [ep #79]

Shout it Down –

A hobotang manhood ritual that occurs between ages 2–4 in which the young tang attempts to scream the oranges out of the tree before learning to climb.  [ep #50]

Show Business –

People disrespect you, and then they pay you, and you’re a whore, goodbye. Sorry, precious writer.  [ep #100]

Show Me Your Bike –

This show is recorded at night, anywhere someone is trying to lay down clean audio. During the day, the same guy fucks up podcasts with a leaf blower.  [ep #101]

Shower –

Where Jen Kirkman listens to the cuddle.  [LC #1]

Shower Rangers –

Any executive brain knows they're a closer. These mountain boys sport Park Ranger outfits and Thug Life tattoos, and their catchphrase is, “What do you mean we're not next?” Extinguishing a fire with ass water is not the ideal scenario for a camper roasting 'mallows, but they miss. By A LOT.  [LC #2]

Sick –

No one wants this for their birthday. When you bring sick to the party, within hours there are kids chuckin’ up everywhere.  [ep #102]

Sideways Baby –

A breach birth baby, and the look on Dave’s face when he tries to give Greg a compliment.  [ep #119]

Silver Lining –

When someone raps about your breath, remember - they didn't target your vagina, and your asshole's no slouch.  [ep #92]

Silverfish –

After making a hot pot & sipping out of a coffee cup from deep within the cupboard, Greg felt one scurry across his tongue to avoid going down his gullet.  [ep #86]

SIPDS –

The Crib Death of SuperPod is being used to raise awareness about this - Sudden Infant Podcast Death Syndrome.  [DoSP]

Siren –

Due to budget cuts, any official vehicle having this can now be used in lieu of a police car - including paramedics, taxis, tow trucks & ice cream trucks.  [ep #96]

Ska Job –

A handjob that you stroke on the up-beat; they may never be the most popular thing, but they’ll always be around.  [ep #62]

Ska Mobile –

Greg’s checkerboard Mini Cooper.  [ep #103]

Skin Mountain –

(or Skin M.
1. Dave's father's girlfriend and noted complainer, insulting troublemaker and drinker. Dave would rather be burned alive in a car fire than slide down Skin Mountain.  [ep #76]  2. Dave’s sister kicked her out of the house for swearing, so now she drops off Dave’s dad and waits for him in the car.  [ep #120] 3. She’s a hoarder.  [ep #120]

Skin Pockets –

Since hobotang babies (or tiny tang) are typically delivered in fountains, they’re born with skin pockets, enabling them to start scrounging for coins the moment they leave the birth canal.  [ep #44]

Skin Roof –

When Dave coined this term for his stomach on-stage to Joel, Greg feared the two might team-up and launch the more successful “Funny & the Bitch.” 
[ep #52]

Skull Fucked with Tasty –

Greg's description of eating at Grill Em All.  [ep #58]

Slave Music –

Greg’s neighbor’s description of the music genre of Django Unchained’s soundtrack.  [ep #117]

Sleepy Time –

The WTRN show about taking Ambien or listening to WTR.  [ep #107]

Slow Strokes –

1. Their escalating errors in speech act as evidence that Dave & Greg have been having these over the past year.  [ep #90]
2. Greg smells toast, but Dave smells oranges.  [LC #2]

Small Actors –

Contrary to what’s being taught, there ARE small actors, including:  “Three Lines Max” Anthony  Wayne “One Scene and Out” Federman“DVD Extras Only” Behrendt  [ep #116]

Smelbow –

Shortened version of “smell my elbow, bro,” the powerful prison phrase that indicates you’ve been corndoggin’ to a frien that may not have seen it. 
[ep #73]

Smoke Me, I’m Dope –

1. A shirt available at Mitch’s garage sale.  [ep #10]
2. A listener offered to make a ‘Dope Me, I’m Smoke’ parody shirt a mere 5 weeks later, but Greg had already completely forgotten the reference. 
[ep #15]

Snack a Face –

Pot’s so strong now, when people get really high, they might try to do this or munch on a neighbor’s dog.  [ep #110]

Snitch –

1. Ellen DeGeneres [ep #24], Greg's former crush.  [ep #106]
2. Ellen's status as a secret Kennedy was unveiled by her JFK haircut and strict "No Snitch" Policy.  [ep #52]
3. Ellen’s TV formula is 45 minutes of dancing followed by the reveal of a dark secret, with the warning, “You snitch, you die.”  [ep #24]
4. Dave caught the episode where Ellen turned to the camera and said, “I have someone else’s blood on my pussy – don’t you snitch!”  [ep #24]
5. A B&N bathroom cruiser instructed Dave not to snitch after informing him “the last guy was a bleeder.”  [ep #39]
6. When Jack White beats you up, don’t snitch – just sneak into his house late at night, beat him with a bat, and whisper ‘that’s from Ellen.’  [ep #67]

Soak Em Ups –

A tampon, crotch-soaker or blood-gatherer.  [ep #109]

Soccer Pure –

Paris Hilton wanted some of that shit from Cristiano Ronaldo.  [ep #119]

Soft Pop –

Greg dubbed himself this after seeing family beach photos & wondering, ‘who’s the fat guy touching my kids?’  [ep #64]

Somewhere Close Where the Podcast Is –

Greg’s wife is planning which city the Behrendt Family is allowed to move to based on this.  [ep #111]

Sorkin, Aaron –

You can write his children’s show, but can you find the child actors to deliver it?  [ep #114]

Sorry –

Greg bought the filmmaking rights to the word, not the game.  [ep #53]

South African Casino Chicken –

1. It may be a gamble, but you can bet it’ll cause you to shit your pants on an airplane.  [ep #9]
2. A potential title for a Reigning Monarch’s song.  [ep #10]

Space Case –

Dave’s 8th grade nickname on account of his huge afro and attention-deficit being misconstrued as stoner behavior.  [ep #8 & #44]

Sparkle Time –

This nickname for Greg's buttle is a German/Behrendt trait upkept by meat and Miracle Greens. It's like fresh, gold linoleum tile - natural, not bleached - like a starfish with a dream.   [ep #76]

Spencer’s Gifts –

The novelty store that chased away the teenage boys with boners loitering near their risqué posters by throwing Magic 8 Balls at them.  [ep #112]

Sperming –

Ejaculating.  [ep #56]

Spider One –

Powerman 5000 frontman and brother of Rob Zombie whose writer/producer role on the MTV series “The Zombies are in the Other Room” helped paved the way for Gus Van Sant's cousin Adam to launch an upcoming show about a possessed leather jacket.  [ep #76]

Spinach Shake –

Dave got diarrhea just from these words coming out of Greg’s mouth.  [ep #104]

Springsteen, Bruce –

1. Greg respects it, but doesn’t love it, and the fans just won’t let it go.  [ep #104]
2. Dave thinks they’re the new Dead heads – a cult that needs to get off his dick.  [ep #104]  
3. It’s hard to tell a new bro that playing a 17 minute Bruce jam from 1973 is a misstep.  [ep #104]
4. The only rule of Walking the Room is not to play this for someone that doesn't want it.  [ep #104]
5. Greg would rather be kicked in the eye.  [ep #110]

Square –

How Greg tweets when he talks about a nice cup of coffee, while others leading more exciting lives talk about eating their own sacks.  [ep #105]

Square Pegs –

The fact that Greg looks like the punk rock guy from this TV show means things are going really well.  [ep #100]

Squier, Billy –

A big star, until he danced across the living room in a tank top and America said NO.  [DoSP]

Squirgles –

The grooves in your sack. Dave calls them gregs.  [ep #110]

Squirt It in Your Pussy! –

The slogan Greg must read for Comfort Fresh Douches, a Patton-arranged sponsor.  [ep #24]

St. Jean, Dillon –

Creator of WTR’s card game, Sadness: The Gathering[FB]

Stairway to Heaven –

When Dave & Greg do live shows, they have to play the hits and do their versions of this, from “Corndoggin'” to “Gryphon”.  [ep #89]

Star Search Rosa Parks –

Greg was pointed out and clapped at while on the back of a bus to Disney World after being recognized as the loser on Star Search. He was the first contestant in history to be awarded 0 stars by Candace Cameron.  [LC #2]

Starfish Circus –

1. They get angry when they get dry, but if you keep them moist, they’ll spin, do tricks and cartwheels, and you can throw them at each other.  [ep #6]
2. Title of the first WTR-centric live event, held at Largo in Los Angeles on June 27, 2011, that featured Dave, Greg, Wil, Patton, Posehn and The Reigning Monarchs.  Post-show, the Customers met with the Managers, and Cuddlah Chris Coleman was upon it as a Gryphon.  [ep #58]
3. Autographed commemorative posters of this event, designed by Paul Armstrong were great to frame or use as toilet paper.  [ep #58] 
4. Tickets make a great bribe for valets in a moral dilemma.  [ep #60]
5. Blow-jobs available in the alley after the show for a very reasonable Tumblr donation[ep #64]
6. Starfish Circus 2 was held at Largo, Los Angeles on Sept 26, 2011 with guests Jimmy Pardo, Kyle Kinane, Jonah Ray and Dick Behrendt. Musical performance by The Reigning Monarchs and WTR ice cream served by Lake Street Creamery.  [ep #71]
7. Starfish Christmas is Monday, December 19, 2011 at Largo, Los Angeles, with guests Patton Oswalt, Karen Kilgariff, FREE WTR ice cream from Lake St. Creamery, & SURPRISES! This is a benefit for The Littlest Tumor Foundation.  [ep #81]

State Fairy –

He grants wishes at the state (not federal) level, so you’ll look under your pillow and find employment.  [ep #71]

Statler & Waldorf –

Wil & Charlie see Dave & Greg as a gritty reboot of this crotchety Muppet duo known for heckling from the balcony; WTR is their origin story.  [ep #40]

Steak Fairy –

He offers you fillet. Dave can’t keep him because he’s for everyone.  [ep #71]

Stefani, Gwen –

1. Greg fingered her. ...For crimes she'd committed.  [ep #93]
2. Greg got a picture of her for Father’s Day that he only kind of masturbates to.  [ep #109]

Stew –

Hot shit in a pot.   [ep #79]

Stewardesses –

Also known as flight attendants, airline prostitutes or the air waitresses that don't get tips that everyone's mean to.  [ep #94]

Stiller Stroke –

People's inappropriately bat-shit crazy reaction to meeting the star of The Ben Stiller Show on FOX.  [ep #97]

Store-All Sheds –

Patton also lined up this commercial for Dave.  The ad depicts the company as the only viable solution for Dave's growing piles of hate mail and death threats.  [ep #24]

Stormfront –

1. A white supremacist organization that throws music festivals featuring acts like The Beastie Boys, Mudhoney, Lady Gaga, and oddly enough, Biz Markie (who views it as a corporate gig, rationalizing that the check isn’t racist).  [ep #50]
2. They bought buildings in Mexico so they could hate with beach-front property and great weed.  [ep #68]
3. Dave creates a myth of Patton for their tour, with false quotes like “call my Jew”.  [ep #93]

Strange Brew –

The one Greg missed – an SCTV-based film starring the McKenzie Brothers (Dave Thomas & Rick Moranis) and Rush.  [ep #115]

Strap-On –

1. Nikki Glaser would opt to wear one rather than having to put her mouth on it.  [ep #92]  2. Dave’s son loves lady stuff like black nail polish and one of these.  [ep #118]

Strip Clubs –

A great place to not get laid and get a hard-on around other dudes.  [ep #30]

Stripes I Like –

This came out of Greg's mouth. He enjoys them on clowns, along with primary colors, shapes and things that are shiny.  [ep #99]

Stuffed Shit Pig –

(aka Fecal Pig)
Dave revealed this recipe without warning, and prior to the scheduled holiday episode.  [ep #41]

Subway –

Greg is unclear as to why anyone would voluntarily eat at this chain unless they were poor or trying to punish themselves.  [ep #38]

Subway Fuck –

When men meet anonymously on the subway, make eye-contact, go somewhere to bang, and lose weight in the process. The code is "Are you Jared?"  [ep #62]

Success Stew –

You add ingredients to this when your choices make a failing situation go from bad to worse.  i.e., When three Hobotangs with a baby on the way are already crammed into a one bedroom apartment, moving in their unemployed sister will surely add to the ‘Success Stew.’  [ep #39]

Suck It –

1. This exotic popsicle shop thinks, despite the economy, their high-end variety will turn a default-setting treat into a ‘let’s go get’.  [ep #72]
2. Varieties include a beef popsicle, a cocksicle and a pussy-flavored pop you have to salt.  [ep #80]

Suck My Face –

The confusing heckle Kinane received that demanded clarification – did the guy in the audience have Tourette’s, or was he actually just hilarious right now?  [ep #69]

Suddenly Susan –

The second episode of this series had the same storyline as supporting star Kathy Griffin's Largo act - it involved sex with a guy who peed on her.  [ep #89]

Suede Party –

Not the band - a pile of dudes that smell like hot ass & suede and’ll crack a buttle. (Much like older gentlemen's Leather Parties that smell like Jim Morrison’s pants.)  [ep #106]

Sugar Pie Anthony –

Despite being described as a hateful human being, this is Dave’s perception of himself.  [ep #50]

Suicidiality Magazine –

Dave’s wife learned about Greg’s suicide plans from this magazine in her dream, but in reality, Greg’s suicide is side-tracked by Guitar Player Magazine and pinky rings.  [ep #72]

Sunglass Hut –

Don't confuse a man for this popular kiosk.  [ep #68]

Super Cuddle –

1. A live podcuddle.  [ep #78 & LC #1]
2. The first Super Cuddle, recorded at Meltdown Comics in LA, is available for download for $2.  [LC #1]
3. A place like Supercuts, popular in Japan, where a dude hugs you while you listen to the podcast. A $10 flat-rate gets you a bro to wrap your shit up. ($15 for the Super Duper)  [ep #78]

Superfist –

Greg differs from Dane Cook because he's 'fuck you' with a fist and no fingers; that is what corndoggin' is.  [ep #80]

Sweet Attendant –

Dave’s job at the Staples Center was to cuddle, love and validate the customers, which included releasing a warm, small piece of caramel from his mouth to theirs. He's also had to delicately whisper to Alec Baldwin’s taint (both on and off the job).  [ep #62]

Sweet Emotion –

Dave would be this Aerosmith song if it could take physical form and walk the earth. Greg agrees because the song is about venerial disease, noting that he personifies Motorhead's Ace of Spades.  [ep #88]

Sweet WTR Trail-Off –

Dick Behrendt is the only one gettin' any, and yes, ladies - he's down to sign your boobs.  [ep #89]

T-Bone Hobo –

Greg's favorite country singer ever.  [ep #83]

Take the Big Coat Off –

Show business consists of prostitutes & pimps, and most people are both – so be prepared to do this if you show up in your pimp clothes on Hooker Day.  [ep #107]

Tales From the Attic –

When this entire podcast (Seth & Zack) attended SC2, Dick Behrendt thought they were a movie.  [ep #71]

Talking Talking Dead –

(and Stalking Talking Dead)  Shows that discuss Talking Dead, the show that discusses Walking Dead.  [ep #75]  Aka Mocking Talking Dead  [ep #76]

Tall & Metal –

Brian Posehn.  [ep #54]

Tampon Rain –

When you feel items falling on your foot and suddenly discover you’re in a puddle of tampons, the rescue mission involves spelunking down into the valley of tampons and an immediate eye-to-eye “we will not speak of this.”  [ep #109]

Tampon Reign –

Where Tampons literally rule upon thee with great vengeance; heaven is the place where tampons reign supreme.  [ep #109]

TapouT –

1. This bro athletic wear boasting “I fucking quit” spawned other retreat-themed clothes like the Punt football shirt, and the entire Forfeit line.  [LC #1]
2. A picture displayed at Meltdown depicts The Kids in the Hall’s Scott Thompson in a TapouT shirt, seemingly because the artist hates gay people.  [ep #100]
3. Jesus wants to wrestle you & make you TapouT with love. He wants to lay his psalms on you. Greg thinks he's WWE.  [ep #102]

Teen Idols –

They're magic that literally make it ok to be shit on.  [LC #2]

Teenagers –

The title of Groovy Glass’ bad but accurate iTunes review. Groovy’s one of those Bill Cosby types who doesn’t live & drown in a sea of fuck, and when Groovy lays it down, you gotta fucking sit up & take notice.  [ep #72]

Telly Savalas’ Party Machine –

"Who loves ya, baby? It’s time to start a party!" This UPN show was ranked the second lowest television program of all time, beaten only by Nick Freno: Substitute Teacher.  [ep #116]

Ten-And-Under Tennis –

The children's tennis league that didn't really need a spokesperson as much as they were given one.  [ep #96]

Tequila Tonight –

Show covering the hard-hitting tequila questions, like if Oprah drinks Sammy Hagar’s Cabo blend.  [ep #100]

Terriers –

Originally bred for ratting.  [ep #38]

Testerosterone –

The double testosterone you get when you have 3 testerosteresticles.  [ep #90]

Texican –

Often referenced long-time listener that Greg confirms is not an actual friend.  [ep #16]

That Candy Thing with Dave & Greg –

1. If you like the same basic idea done over & over again in clown outfits [ep #51], watch Dave & Greg review candy in these shorts on Walking the Room's YouTube Channel.   2. They’re considering a gritty reboot.  [ep #117]

The Apple –

The nickname given to Dave when he got shirtless at a pool party.  [ep #107]

The Apprentice with Pets –

The premise of a new show about dogs that fail at a bake sale. The Pekingese was supposed to make & sell cookies, and the Poodle was supposed to market them. They're both fired.  [ep #98]

The Audacity of Nope –

When Dave was a child, this floored his mom into cooking dinner for Red Menace and his girlfriend.  [ep #120]

The ‘Silent H’ Fight of 1987 –

Dave wonders if this incident between Greg & Brian Posehn is covered in IFC’s Gayest Fights Ever.  [ep #44]

The Expendables –

The next film in the franchise will star Macauly & Kieran Culkin.  [ep #118]

The Fury –

Dave’s anger.  [ep #18]

The Great Bucket Bill of 1902 –

Teddy Roosevelt did a Train Tour across the US to promote this during his “Please Stop Shitting on the Lawn” campaign designed to curb Americans from heaving one out. His success in making it illegal eventually led to the Great Depression.  [ep #108]

The Lollipop Guild –

The Wizard of Oz melody Greg parodies to welcome you to Walking the Room.  [ep #106]

The Montreal Way –

Getting your voice heard in Canada by mailing human feet to conservative politicians.  [ep #106]

The More You Bro –

The ad campaign that informs bros in the know.  [ep #117]

The Old Guy Room –

Room where once-young arrogant comics go when they age to discuss their crushed dreams over free coffee.  [ep #107]

The Oracle –

Dave’s belly.  Ask, and this warm bag of taffy rolled in hair shall answer. 
[ep #57]

The Other Guy from the Closet –

What Greg's daughter calls Patton.  [ep #93]

The Reigning Monarchs –

Greg's Surf, Ska, Punk, Spy, Cowboy Noir Band. www.thereigningmonarchs.com

The Road –

1. Dave describes this depressing Viggo Mortensen film as a metaphor for their careers.  [ep #42]
2. The show later evolves into this starring Bill Cosby.  [ep #64] 

The Rock Star of Australian Comedy –

Wil took this out-of-context blurb from the worst review he had ever gotten and used it on his posters for the next 3 years.  [DoSP]

The Sandwich Situation –

The Last Supper.  [ep #102]

The Tickle –

The specific sensation that triggered Greg’s vomiting after he stepped on a Cicada bug.  [ep #47]

The Tip of the Dick is Touching the Top of the Counter –

(or The Tip of the Dick is Tapping the Top of the Counter)
1. A new vocal exercise.  [ep #91]
2. Main task of the gym's hired random nude.  [ep #91]

The Ultimate in Maintaining –

WTR is like the heroin fix you need that doesn't even get you high anymore.  [ep #99]

The Wanderers –

Some problems should still be handled with gang-style violence as featured in this 1979 film.  [ep #87]

The White Montel Williams –

Greg, with his bus full of medicine & his tightly-trimmed goatee.  [ep #107]

The Y –

1. Fun for the whole family! Get yelled at in a pool & get your butthole washed!  [ep #48] 2. Dave wants to kill The Loud Guy there because he drowns out TOFOP.  [ep #116] 

Thelma & Louise –

The cuddle will be driven off a cliff and end badly, much like this film. 
[ep #60]

This Is Not My Groom! –

Dave decided to take a break from commercial acting the moment someone screamed this on-set while pointing at his face.  [ep #61]

This, Pants, The Band –

The three things Greg would prefer to make his living from so he doesn't have to show up for “No.”  [ep #105]

Three-way –

Dave missed his chance at a post-show three-way when two horned-up fan girls were given the wrong address by an uninformed doorman.  [ep #47]

Thunderclap Johnson –

Dubbed "King of the Lions" – he's the one straight guy in the dance troupe that gives women the good fuckin’ they’ve been waiting for.  [ep #115]

Tim Tam Slam –

1. Dave has vowed not to attempt this method of consumption until he has landed on Australian soil.  [ep #55]
2. The sexual act you might discover upon searching the cookie on Porn Hub.  [ep #55]

Tim Tams –

1. The fuel on which the cuddle runs.  [ep #17]
 2. Greg discovered these chocolate cookies, available in cookie flavor, during his visit to Australia.  He brought some back, and offered Dave Tim Tams during the pilot.  [ep #1]
 3. They render you naked, shaking in your bed, asking ‘where can I get more Tim Tams?’ an hour after consumption.  [ep #1]
 4. They’re like eating God’s pussy.
 5. Dave & Greg are withholding live comedy from Australia until they deliver a mobile home, castle and airport constructed entirely of Tim Tams.  [ep #46]
6. Cake & Shake inspired this big breakthrough during the session; milk, ice cream, Tim Tams & a blender = drinkable Tim Tams.  [ep #50]
7. In the future, when a Cuddlah inevitably snaps, authorities will deduce Tim Tam is the suspect’s slain girlfriend unless this glossary is entered into evidence.  [ep #50]
8. Use their sleeve of white chocolate to spice things up in the sackeroo. 
[ep #61]

Tiny 2-Man Secret Flash Mobs –

Greg & Dave are going to start planning secret dancing and human domino events, but just for themselves.  [ep #86]

Tiny Connections –

Dave's slang for The Greg Behrendt Show segment Uncomfortable Phone Calls.  [ep #84]

Tiny Dollhouse Solutions –

Alternate title for the unsuccessful fictional podcast Little Big Dollhouse Explanations.  [ep #39]

Tiny Nazi Uniform –

Greg’s daughters might as well have been wearing these when they walked into the house dressed in full Dodger gear. The feeling is comparable to finding out someone’s a racist, or has a previously unrevealed dark, ugly side.  [ep #110]

Tiny Wheeled Hospital –

An Ambulance.  [ep #110]

Titanic –

WTR is like this - an inch away from the iceberg.  [ep #93]

Toddler Ball Gags –

Simplest solution to stop your 2 year old from crying 2-6 times per day.  [ep #75]

TOFOP –

(formerly Thirty Odd Foot of Pod)
The sister podcast out of Australia, hosted by Wil Anderson & Charlie Clausen [ep #24 & #25] - it’s like WTR, only they’re handsome & not fucking losers.  [ep #33]

TOFOP Conversations –

The two types – big, meaningful topics & hypotheticals – both end in rape & shiving. They make shit up and talk about it for an hour (i.e. smooth taint or functioning vagina?)  [ep #82]

Tom Cruise Poster –

During Katie Holmes’ plot to dig her way to safety, she used this to hide the hole she had been slowly carving out with a toothbrush for years.  [ep #115]

Total Grippin’ No Tippin’ Scottie Pippen –

He’s known for running up expensive tabs and not tipping, as well as his tight, undomesticated buttle.  Verdict?  Hell of an asshole!  [ep #59]

Tour of Africa –

The live tour forced upon the winner of a hotdog eating contest - he must play video footage of himself shoving 67 tube-shaped pieces of meat down his gullet throughout the continent’s poorest villages.  [ep #111]

Tramp, Mike –

The only two people that have ever heard of this White Lion singer are Greg Behrendt & Mike Tramp.  [ep #58]

Trannies –

1. Even the most passable Scottish ones can’t do much to hide their masculine brogue.  [ep #2 & #34]
2. Trannies are the modern day unicorn, and they both spit golden awesome.  [ep #46]
3. In Florida, triple-dick trannies emerge after nightfall.  [ep #56]
4. Greg immediately knows where to find one, and Dave knows if you want to render a tranny defenseless, you grab it by the horn.  [ep #59]
5. Dave thinks finding this term offensive is retarded.  [ep #94]
6. When they jump in your car, it’s worse than a hooker. You’re forced to exit the vehicle.  [ep #101]

Trans Bender –

Greg's getting a sex change for another chance at a talk show, this time about a man who got rid of his cock & went out drinking, tentatively titled this.  [ep #77]

Traveltang –

(or Time Traveling Futuretang)
Just as smart as Hobotang, but this breed has the ability to go into the future to get dumb shit and bring it back - like a lemon, or a self-starting device for an older model Camero.  [ep #41]

Tricks –

1. Dave became obsessed with a female he thought was a prostitute, wondering how the middle-aged woman made a living “turning tricks all day” after he misinterpreted being told she was “having drinks all day”.  [ep #105]
2. This scenario will turn into The Worst ‘I’m Flying Out to Fuck You’ Story if you don’t do a pre-show - start the pancakes, come back to them & flip ‘em.  [ep #108]

Troll –

1. A little naked dude with big hair, or “Patton.”  [ep #57] 2. Because Greg’s daughter is wee, Dave likes to put her away in the troll doll box on the shelf before he leaves.  [ep #60]

Trunks –

Friends of Dave’s shady uncle ended up in these (in the ‘dead’ way, not the ‘fraternity prank’ way).  [ep #68]

Turf War –

Due to Australia's dangerous podcast climate, SIM cards holding your recordings must be kept in a safe because you don't know what a rival show is going to do. Podcasting was responsible for 38 deaths this year alone, and Dave's hotel room was tagged upon his arrival to Melbourne.  [ep #98]

Turkey Wobble –

Greg uses a scarf indoors because he has this but can't iron his neck.  [ep #88]

Turkeys –

Greg hated this movie pitch so much, he threatened to kill Dave just for reading it.  [ep #53]

Tweet Release Party –

A Kanye move – an event to mark an upcoming tweet or two.  [ep #107]

Tweeter –

A bargain basement site, like Famebook.  [ep #94]

Twice Baked Potatoes –

Dave’s not gonna deny it, he’s just gonna come right out and say it – he like them. But DO NOT give them to him as gifts – they don’t hold up or travel well.  [ep #115]

Two-Man Shanty Town –

WTR is this, built from the scraps that Greg & Dave accumulate like birds building a nest.  [ep #67]

U2 –

The band that can't have fun & call it fun.  [ep #95]

UFC –

If it was Ultimate Fighting Chickens, Wil would watch.  [ep #83]

Ultimate Cunt –

(or UC)
Reality TV competition that Greg won just by showing up.  [ep #66]

Ultimate Nightmare Scenario –

It's Dave's smoker mother-in-law living on his couch indefinitely.  [ep #85]

Unbreakable –

Not a great superpower.  You're not gonna get a lot done, and some people are gonna die.  You can, however, use your ability to see the future to prevent rape by sucking all the cum out of a potential offender's balls.  [ep #40]

Under Train Dump –

(or UTD)
1. Dave's son couldn't articulate the concept enough to prevent his grandma from calling the police.  [ep #91]
2. If you're going in for a UTD, regardless of age or class, you gotta let people know.  [ep #91]

Unfair –

Greg had to borrow this word from a box over at Never Not Funny to use it on the cuddle.  [ep #52]

Universal City Nissan –

Dave's rants on this car dealership have become reminiscent of Lenny Bruce reading his trial transcripts.  [ep #83]

Unleashed a Brian –

Posehn's stringent rule against Pearl Jam ridicule ultimately led to this term, meaning ‘to take a shit.’  [ep #54]

Up My Black Ass 6 –

After careful consideration, an adult film star in Greg’s studio audience declared this to be her most notable work.  [ep #66]

Urethra –

Even the word makes Greg sit bunched up & scared.  [ep #118]

Urine Streaming –

Dave’s been doing it for years. It’s part of his game – he’s got a heavy stream, and he’s a pro, so he knows when pee story and a wall piss spot don’t match.  [ep #120]

Vacuums –

Greg & Dave would look great, if they were in a profession other than show business. If they sold these door-to-door or retail, it’d be a fuck party, and there’d be a lot of sucking jokes.  [ep #119]

Vaginal Mesh Patch –

Talk of this recalled product nearly made Greg walk out of the 'cast.  [ep #85]

Vaginal Rejuvenation –

One of many important topics covered on The Greg Behrendt Show.  [ep #29]

Vanilla Ice –

Known Juggalo who once tweeted:  “My little girls like Justin Bieber and I’m a Juggalo, go figure!  LOL!  All good!  Whoop whoop!  Ninja!”  [ep #33]  When Dave retweeted this, Cuddlahs that did the same found themselves being followed by Vanilla Ice.  Dave clarified that he can’t help it if Vanilla Ice sticks to you.  [ep #35]

Vedder, Eddie –

The Pearl Jam singer that spit on Dave.  [ep #103]

Ventura –

1. You have a Chili’s? THEY have a Chili’s! It’s the gateway to happiness - Catalina, a magical place where you can swim with the dolphins. Visit when you land in LA, but really just wanted to be in California.  [ep #105]
2. Destination of a fundamentalist Christian bachelor party that involves a trip to a 50’s diner, a lesson from your groomsmen on how to fuck the bride-to-be you’ve never kissed, and some spontaneous antiquing.  [ep #105] 
3. When you book a getaway trip with Greg & Dave, you’ll spend the day there, antiquing then watching a live podcast.  [ep #106]

Very Special Episode –

The cuddle equivalent to Arnold & Dudley’s bike shop molestation, Webster’s mother’s miscarriage [ep #54], Facts of Life’s school election suicide or Edith Bunker’s rape.  [ep #66]

Vests –

WTR is planning on scrapping all other merchandise and only selling vests.  And socks, but you have to buy the set.  [ep #59]

Virgin Airlines –

It has its moments, and it's modern 2004. There's a rave feel with pink and purple lights, a lot of white plastic, a DJ in the back and a ton of coke.  [ep #88]

Vomit Pie –

When you puke on the pizza, you straight up fuck up the pie. They don’t have that on the menu. You know why? Because people don’t eat pie that’s been thrown up on. It’s a bummer.  [ep #102]

Waffle Cone Ice Cream –

Congratulate yourself for doing a great podcast with a pint of this and a Flaming Lips documentary.  [ep #120]

Wagon of Clouds –

The band that plays Coachella and is currently on tour with Mumford & Sons.  [ep #113]

Wagon of Clowns –

The Cum Catch Phrase Dave feels should be blurted out in porn.  [ep #113]

Walken the Room –

The new podcast where Kevin Pollak impersonates Christopher Walken the entire time.   [ep #118]

Walking Home in a Onesie –

An album and metaphor for Greg's career.  [LC #1]

Walking the Room Radio Podcast Network –

(or WTRN)  [ep #94]
1. Walking the Room is what started the empire and remains at the tippity-top of this network, now with 5,000 podcasts, including hits like Silverfish, Fistful of Failure, How Patton Oswalt Died, and Pockets, Pockets, Pockets.  [ep #88]
2. They have a total of 1 shows.  [ep #93]
3. They started the network just to reject people back.  [ep #93]

Walking the Room Tub –

The podcast-endorsed sanitizing dick bags. Dip your dick, meet a chick - dunk your junk in this vat of Purell before banging a pro ho, bro!  [ep #105]

Walnut –

1. Greg’s word for buttle.  [ep #51]2. Dave puts eyeballs in them & he talks to them.  [ep #114]

Wangs –

The Palm Springs Chinese restaurant that’s just dudes in tight shirts.  [ep #103]

War & Peace of Anal Cannons –

Patton's description of Dave Holmes' “3 minute” story.  [LC #2]

Warm Yogurt –

Greg calls cold yogurt warm and frozen yogurt cold.  [ep #72]

Watching White Girls –

The podcast where hosts view & discuss the film White Girls. It gets repetitive after the pilot.  [ep #107]

Wax –

What Greg uses to encase a dead seal found post-Sweater Cruise.  [ep #82]

We Just Chicken Pickin' –

What John Mayer said to Ben Harper, being that they're both bluesmen. 
[ep #39]

We're Kind of a Little Bit Cunty –

A Kings of Leon radio hit.  [ep #99]

Weekend at Bernie’s –

1. There’s only one perfect movie. …And they had to ruin it with a sequel.   [ep #116]    2. The gritty reboot involves two guys walking around with a decomposing corpse.  [ep #116] 3. The gritty reboot stars Corey Haim.  [ep #118]

Welcome Back Carter –

The movie about John Carter going back to the red thing to fight sloths with vacuums.  [ep #107]

Welcome Back to Walking the Room... –

1. The lyrics to Greg’s repetitive improvised song that infuriates Dave.  [ep #42]
2. Classic hits from the vault.  [ep #111]

Wellbutrin Situation –

What Greg needs to even his shit out after 2 weeks gluten-free.  [ep #105]

Wetsuit Tux –

The outfit you wear to ass-surf in a shit-fall.  [ep #69]

What Sayest Thou? –

The line used to successfully fool old people & school children into thinking a Trainspotting-style Shakespeare in the Park is going as planned.  [ep #82]

What the Fuck with Marc Maron –

(or WTF)
1. The podcast Greg & Dave urge you to listen to [ep #1], possibly in lieu of WTR, as they're the infant retards to Maron’s Charlie Rose.  [ep #37]
2. Patton's list of new titles for WTR included ‘What the Fuck without Marc Maron.’  [ep #16]
3. After witnessing the first live cuddle, Marc Maron gave WTR a passionate endorsement on WTF episode #229 - Mary Lynn Rajskub.  [ep #79]
4. People see this podcast live because they don’t always need to go out for a good yuck.  [ep #101]

What Used to be Interesting –

A program highlighting old crock pot recipes & former book authors.  [ep #74]

What’s Happening to Me? –

A woman’s loud outburst during a play after a can of Greg’s pee dripped on her from above.  [ep #41]

What’s in the Bag? –

1. The game you play when you catch a typically friendly acquaintance with a small plastic bag making an unexplained 2am garbage shame run.  [ep #60] 2. It was assumed to be a rag covered in blood or cum.  [ep #117]

What’s With the Sun in Philadelphia? –

Old Man Casting got Dave a role on this show.  [ep #116] 

Wheelschwitz –

A pile of tires set ablaze – inextinguishable, and emitting toxic fumes. 
A tire holocaust.  [ep #43]

White Swallow –

The milk bar that reinforces the stereotype that gays like birds.  [LC #2]

White, Jack –

America’s only tangible product.  [ep #110]

Who Gives a Fuck Bucket –

(or I Don’t Give a Shit Bucket[ep #17]
1. Dave wasn’t sure how much he could fit in it.  [ep #16]
2. Greg peeked into the bucket and found Dave’s career, hope & scripts they should be working on.  [ep #16]

Who’s Old? –

A show laced with throwback references like Lunatic Fringe, Live to Tell and Big Valley.  [ep #100]

Whole Foods –

Their new campaign? “Tampons in the Store, Assholes Out!” Get showered with tampon rain while you’re there, and watch a man about to wipe air out his asshole in the parking lot as you leave!  [ep #109]

Whoops! –

Kyle Kinane’s tattoo illustrating his belief that tattoos aren’t a good idea. 
[ep #69]

Why U Iz? –

The question the podcuddle seeks to answer.  [ep #38]

Why U Like U Iz?: The Story of a Cuddlah –

The book Greg insists they need to write.  [ep #31]

Why We Left –

The special 4th of July edition of WTR that reaffirms one rude Brit is an indictment of all of them. We left, and look at what we’ve done.  [ep #111]

Wig Shop –

(aka Wiggin' Out)  
WTR Broadway musical auditioning at Starfish Circus NY.  [ep #77]

Wigged-Up –

1. When you get upsold at the wig store and talked into buying 3 looks (medium hair, long hair & I just got a haircut), or the rounded Trump-shaped strawberry-blond that's a swirl-around with no root.  [ep #77]
2. Dave's mother-in-law didn't go for the trio – she only has one wig that she soaks in his sink.  [ep #93]

Wigglets –

Winged pigs that will be branded WTR and sold.  [ep #76]

Wingman –

Doug thought Greg was a great one because he’d always go after the fatter girl.  [ep #116]

Wings –

Greg is convinced if he had these, even inanimate objects would want to fuck him.  [ep #49]

Wink –

1. The Official Secret Wink & Greeting:  New rule - when you see another Cuddlah, you wink & say ‘How ‘bout that, bro.” It’s the Cuddlah version of a secret handshake. What’s exciting is, if you do it to a non-Cuddlah, you might get punched, so be very careful during LA PodFest – do it to a Maron fan, you’ll probably be okay, but you go winkin’ at those Redban guys, some shit can go down. It’s just like life, you take a risk.  [ep #102] 
2. Jesus loved to wink.  [ep #102] 
3. Dave started winking in real life because it freaks people out.  [ep #102]  
4. It’s a Power Move.  [ep #102]
5. The response is to say “haHA!” and point, as established by a mental patient posing as a fire inspector in an elevator.  [ep #104]
6. What you do after asking a tampon rainmaker, “Is it weird that I’m getting sushi?”  [ep #109]
7. The listenership gave this to indicate they might slip a finger in there (Starfish Brooklyn), then slipped into the bathroom to change, left to meet Pete Holmes, and it ends where they report it as a rape.  [ep #110]

Winkable Moments –

We have to think of our Winkable Moments – write em down & tweet em to @GregBehrendt & @DaveAnthony. A sample Winkable Moment would occur when you follow up a food order at a drive-thru with, “Thanks, Boo Bear.”  [ep #113]

Witch Nose –

proper noun:  
1. The female of the hipster couple that moved into Dave's complex, then slipped a note (written with a quill on parchment) under his door listing their grievances.  [ep #75]  
2. Rich bitch equestrian.  [ep #81]
3. Dave envisions himself spray painting “cunt” on the hood of her car and has constant and never-ending stories of revenge in his head just because she exists.  [ep #87]
4. Her ugly face requires her head to be in a cage with a door, because she’s gotta eat. The door opens so you can put food or your dick in there.  [ep #101]  
5. She kicked Linus out and moved in a family-oriented French guy.  [ep #106] 
noun:  
6. Your vet might be wearing one on Halloween during a serious, emotional conversation about the life and health of your pet.  [ep #76]

Wolverines –

Dave’s name for the film Red Dawn.  [ep #114]

Woods, Tiger –

You may see him emerge from Crickets’ 19th hole, otherwise known as the bar, and you may speak freely of Tiger without the fear of being blocked. 
[ep #55]

Woofstock –

After his successful dog show debut, Greg confirmed he would gladly announce this upcoming event [ep #37], or walk a Weimaraner.  [ep #38]

Words –

1. Dave doesn’t have them [ep #54], and Greg likes them [ep #28], but they don’t love him back.  [ep #57]
2. Greg makes hand gestures on the audio podcast because he ‘can’t say the word without seeing one.’  [ep #65]  3. There’s a pile of them on the floor – the cuddles is formed when they grab them and say it out loud.  [ep #116]

World's Gayest Tea Drinker –

The male of Dave's hipster couple neighbors that's straight-up Urban Outfitters with his beard and horn-rimmed glasses.  [ep #75]    

World's Worst Gang –

Their initiation is to break everyone on the block's car windows except for the drummer from Blondie.  [ep #91]

Worthy Pursuits –

The new name of the show, not to be confused with Ideals or Endeavors.  [ep #86]

Wrapping the Bowl –

Jonah's phrase for when you take a shit so good, you have to lie down afterward.  [ep #62]

Yell Your One-Ups –

Live cuddles are a great time to blurt out a name-drop; be it saving Don Knotts, killing Tom Poston, or blowing Norman Fell.  [ep #100]

Yellow Bars –

Underground clubs where patrons gather to pee on each other.  [ep #62]

Yelp –

Dave Holmes' asshole gets great reviews on here. Highly recommended.  [LC #2]

Yiddish –

Dave’s son learned this language at his pre-school.  [ep #103]

Yogurt Doesn’t Need You –

Slogan used to deter the public from cumming in yogurt.  [ep #74]

You're Not Interested in the Boy –

1. What a Clown of Decadence will state to thwart the unwanted advances of old men when you're in a gay bar, having a dance and that.  [ep #99]
2. The name of Dave's next show.  [ep #99]

You’re So Tight –

Dave screams it during sex like a threat.  [ep #118]     

Young MC –

Dave's done for podcasting what he did for rapping – made it accessible to white people.  [ep #76]

Your Closet Iz –

A reality show on Bravo that documents WTR coming to your home and recording in your closet.  [ep #38]

Yourboat –

Rowie's last name (the guy who doesn't book the bands at Conan).  [ep #90]

YouTube Commenters –

Horrible people and the lowest form of human.  [ep #107]

Zero to Bin Laden –

The acceleration level of Dave’s rage that he must stifle in front of his son.  [ep #111]

Zero to Rage –

The manner in which Dave snaps after prolonged exposure to a small judge you don't want to upset.  [ep #84]

Zima –

A not-too-rapey Texas morning situation good for an a.m. buzz.  [LC #1]

Zip, Flop, Meander –

1. When Greg gets angry, his dick comes out - in that sequence. Then he’ll threaten to only leave if you can fit it all in your mouth.  [ep #61]
2. The action that supermarket employee Anthony Garcia was prepared to take if a woman asked for another semen-laced yogurt sample.  [ep #72]
3. If Novak Djokovic asked to watch, Greg would need a few months to get in better shape before doing this.  [ep #91]

Zippity Zip –

The first few zip lines were a bummer, like this first version, that went straight down.  [ep #104]

Zombie –

1. Dave tries to convince Greg he MUST kill his wife should she turn zombie.  [ep #36]
2. These attacks provide leftover arms to gnaw on later.  [ep #38]
3. Greg thinks a zombie covered in a shit-rain with vomit on him helps, but Dave thinks it doesn’t need condiments.  [ep #71]
4. Since working on Talking Dead, Dave has become very conscious of zombie escape routes.  [ep #72]